Popcorn Cupcake

Why, hello there!

2010-01-29T05:17:00.000-08:00

For anyone still following along, I know it's been 9 months. I'm making a couple updates to my blog and am deciding if I will keep posting here. Life got really messy and complicated in 2009. I'll just put it simply and say - it sucked. I've learned a lot about life and myself, that's for sure.

I'm not one to focus on the negative though. I'm so very blessed and fortunate to be able to tell you that I've done well health wise with my melanoma diagnosis. I had surgery back in March to remove a big chunk out of my leg and I had a lymph node biopsy. Since the original biopsy of the skin cancer came back as a clark level III (out of 5), I was facing the possibility that the cancer had spread. A few weeks after my surgery, my lymph nodes came back clean, which means that appears for now that the cancer hasn't spread, so I didn't have to go through chemo. All of my follow up appointments have been good so far. I'm planning on getting a PET scan in the next month to follow up on things, but I have no reason to believe anything is wrong. It's just to be sure. I want to be sure.

The kids are doing great. Aidan is now in Kindergarten and showing amazing progress. He makes me laugh every day and he's the sweetest child on earth. I thank God every day for him and that fact that he has some special needs just makes him who he is, and I love him just the way he is. Brigid has excelled in school and loves reading and piano. They're just 2 great little kids.

I hope to keep posting updates and get back here. 2010 is a whole new year and I have a whole new life. My parents are gone, but I still have many great family and friends and I've been shown so much love this year. I have God and my faith that has pulled me through every dark moment these past few years and has been the light that kept me on the right path and has given me hope.

I don't mean to sound overly dramatic, but it's been a bad few years. "Lo, though you walk through the valley of the shadow of death..." I've been in the valley of death and despair, but I don't fear. I truly feel like I'm emerging out of it and I've got a lot to look forward to in life. I don't know what the new year will bring, but no matter what, I'm not alone and I'm not afraid.

And the bad news is...

2009-05-01T06:24:00.000-07:00

Many of you who know me well and read my blog, know why I haven’t been posting. I don’t mean to be mysterious to the rest of you. It’s just I’ve been having a lot of issues that I don't want to broadcast out into the world, to be recorded forever and ever… amen. I’ve let a few months slide by in my postings, so I thought I’d draft a small update. At least I’ll try to keep my little family blog from atrophying. I have been posting here for over two years and I’ve hardly let a week go by. Why did I suddenly stop posting for a few months?

Let’s start with Aidan. I am trying to keep his privacy for the future in check here, but I think it’s OK to say we’ve been dealing with autism here. At this point, we know it’s a relatively mild case, or high-functioning autism – something that appears to be around the Asperger’s level, and maybe a little worse. The good news is that it’s clear that he has amazing intellectual gifts! He has amazed many of his therapists with his ability to spell words, write letters and draw. It’s clear he is gifted in art, music, math and writing. That’s a lot to say for a four year old! The negative side of all of this is, as with most autism cases, he has a lot to overcome socially. Poor eye-contact, speech delays, lack of imaginative play and trouble making friends to name a few. We’re working hard with him and have him in different types of therapy

Dealing with that has taken up a lot of my time and thoughts… until…

I had my annual physical at the beginning of April, where my doctor noticed a funny looking mole on my lower-right leg. I’ve had a few funny looking moles removed in the past. I’m a moley kind of girl, and have even passed my frecklieness onto my dear children. Funny looking freckles on me do not tend to send up the alarm bells for me, but occasionally I’ve had them taken off, just to be sure. The doctor sliced, stitched, and I was on my merry way. It didn’t even hit my worry meter, which is saying a lot for someone who’s been known to lose sleep over where I’m going to park for a doctor’s appointment the next day. I like to worry.

About a week later, my doctor’s office called me at work. “Your biopsy results came back today. Can you come in this afternoon to consult?” It usually takes me at least 7 days to get an appointment with this doctor, and here he was calling me to come in that afternoon?! Try to finish a work day after that. I figured it wasn’t a social call, but I had no idea what it might really be. Time to dwell and obsess for awhile!

Since I worked for Mayo Clinic for a number of years, their website, www.mayoclinic.com tends to be my first reference stop when looking up health information. I typed skin cancer into the search bar and came up with:

Skin cancer — the abnormal growth of skin cells — most often develops on skin exposed to the sun. But this common form of cancer can also occur on areas of your skin not ordinarily exposed to sunlight.
There are three major types of skin cancer — basal cell carcinoma, squamous cell carcinoma and melanoma, which is the most serious of skin cancer.
Since I had no idea which one it might be, I googled pictures of each type, to see if any looked like mine. I started with the first two less-serious ones and they just didn’t fit the bill. The Melanoma one? The one that says “is the most serious of skin cancer”? Yeah. That’s exactly what mine looked like. The kind that kills people.

The more I read about melanoma, the more worried I became.

“Malignant melanoma is the most dangerous type of the skin cancers. Typical features of melanomas include irregular borders, multiple colors within the lesion, rapid growth, and susceptibility to easy injury with bleeding. Any mole that exhibits any of these changes should be evaluated immediately by your physician.”

Check. Check. Check and… yep. Check!

photo below is an example of what mine looked like, but not an actual picture of mine. I never thought to take a picture of it, although I kind of regret that now.

By the time I got to the doctor’s office, I was a complete wreck. He handed me the pathology report, and it was exactly as I had feared – Malignant Melanoma – Clark stage III. My doctor appeared to be as shocked by the diagnosis as I was. He honestly thought it was just a simple mole. He rightfully patted himself on the back a bit for SAVING my LIFE! After all, I did not even point the mole out to him. He noticed it as he was checking me reflexes. If he had not noticed and removed the mole, simply put, it would’ve killed me.

Happy thoughts…

The next step for me will be to go in to surgery on Monday and have 2 square inches of skin removed around the original mole site. (Draw 2 inches and make a square out of it, and you’ll get the idea of the size.) I’m not very excited about this, but at least they’ll put me under and give me good drugs for the situation.

In addition, they will do something called a sentinel lymph node biopsy to find out if the cancer has spread. I’m not entirely sure what’s involved in that, but I’ll post more next week and let you all know the joy of a lymph node bisopsy. My prayers right now is that they are clean, because that means I’m done and can go on my merry way, with checkups every 6 months. If I have cancer in my lymph nodes, the next step is chemotherapy.

Chemo. We really really don’t want to think about that. After all, you know my hair is important to me.

That is all, in a nutshell, why I haven’t written. In the future I’ll write more about what has occurred in the past few months, when I’m ready, but I will keep you updated on my current situation. It's an amazing world we live in with this fancy schmancy internet thing. I just have to stay off of Google and melanoma searches because it's a scary internet out there too!

A is for Aidan - PART I

2009-02-01T22:50:00.000-08:00

The stories have been funny. Boys will be boys after all. The “funny” Aidan stories are never in short supply. What a funny little quirky child – always up to some mischief. He has always had a mind of his own. But in the past six months or so, his funny quirkiness hasn’t seemed quite so cute and funny anymore. More worrisome than anything. Aidan is going on five soon. At what point do you draw the line and realize when a child just isn’t behaving like other children his age should be behaving? What is normal after all?

I be not one to judge that...

In the past five years or so, I’ve never known a parent of a young child who hasn’t had the big "A" worry. Talk of vaccine scares and toxins in our food and enviornment affecting our children are topics of everyday chatter at moms groups. From the time children are 18 months old, we’re all being told to watch for symptoms of... IT. Is the child talking? Is he giving eye contact? Aidan did those things. No hand flapping or tippe-toe walking. See… no need to worry about A. Except…

Aidan never really has played with other children, or participated in “circle time” or other organized activities. Many times I've watched groups of 30 kids all sit down to a puppet show or movie, except Aidan who continues to just do his own thing. He’s been known to pitch complete blow-out tantrums if another child comes into his space. That can be normal for two year olds and even three year olds. Four years? It should be stopping. He should be more interested in other children and joining the crowd. It’s sad when the other children at daycare come running up to him, excited to see him, and he just ignores them and goes straight to his favorite toys. Of course, that alone doesn’t point to anything wrong. At least he talks and communicates, except…

Aidan’s teachers have asked us on different occasions to have his hearing checked. We did, and his hearing is tip-top. He just doesn’t speak normally. It’s one of the first things people notice about him. He speaks very slowly and very loudly. From the time he was two, he has used great big eloquent words, but he can’t seem to spit them out. Where other children are rambling and babbling, Aidan tends to struggle to express his thoughts, slowly and methodically. He over stresses parts of words and becomes frustrated when he can’t get his thoughts out. He becomes irate when we finish his sentences for him, but sometimes I just can’t help it because I know what he’s trying to say, he just can’t get it out! Speech problems in young children are very common, and he will start speech therapy in a couple weeks to see what’s going on with language. Not something to worry about on its own, but again, we have another EXCEPT…

Aidan is also a deeply obsessive child. When he was two and could play with his train set for three hours straight, we found it cute and we were happy he had such a wonderful attention span. You just couldn’t break that boy away from his activities. To this day, he can sit and color a picture for more than an hour. He will obsess over every line and dot of color and completely tune out the rest of the world. He won’t even break away for a snack or treat. He learned how to write the number 4 this week, and he spent 45 minutes drawing 4’s all over a piece of paper. Big ones, small ones, thick ones, thin ones. He just loved that number. Not… normal… behavior.

The worrisome thing is the way he obsesses over toys isn’t really playing with them. He can build tracks and push a train around the set, but he’s not pretending to, say, pick up passengers or role play a story. He’s only interested in the mechanics of toys. It took me a long time to realize this, since he was always busy with his toys. We’ve been proudly watching him and thinking what a great engineer he will be someday since he loves to build, and missing the fact that he’s not really playing.

A couple months ago I got the Dreaded Daycare Director call. As I’ve posted before, we’ve had many daycare issues in the past, and directors never call to tell you what a delightful child you have. She was mostly concerned that our 4 ½ year old is still having potty-training issues, among other things. These are things daycare directors are concerned with, as opposed to a child who obsessively and quietly draws numbers for hours being a problem. After a few minutes of discussion she asked me “have you taken him to see a doctor?”

What kind of question was that? Of course we go to the doctor! He gets his annual Well Child visit each year and he’s fit as a fiddle!

“Not that kind of doctor. One for… behavior issues.”

I knew what she was getting at, but I wanted to hear her say it. I wanted her to tell me exactly what she was thinking. “No? What do you mean? What kind of behavior issues?”

She was silent for a moment, and I could tell she was trying to formulate her words carefully. Maybe she’s afraid I’d turn her in for falsely diagnosing my child, or sue her for insulting him. “He seems to have some autistic tendencies.”

There. She said it. And as much as I knew it was coming, it still hit me like a ton of bricks to hear the dreaded A word being used to describe my child. All these years I’ve been looking for it, and looking away at the same time. I didn’t want to see it and I didn’t want it diagnosed.

My strategies this past two years are starting to unravel. I’ve been waiting for him to outgrow his quirks, yet he seems to only be growing into them more. Every time we solve one behavior issue, two more seem to crop up in its place. Some days he behaves so well that we can overlook the quirkiness. He’s so funny and loving and just darn cute! But kindergarten is looming just 6 months away, and I know it’s irresponsible to just sit and assume everything is fine. It was time to see what’s really going on. Maybe it's nothing, or maybe...

Time to see a developmental pediatrician.

to be continued...

New Year. Again.

2008-12-31T05:34:00.000-08:00

So… I suppose you noticed it’s been awhile since I posted anything. Yeah. I’m sure I can be forgiven for my lapse. Having our parents pass away within months of each other, and just before the whole “holiday season” began, sucked away my writing ambitions for awhile.

I can’t even say that I was all that busy, since honestly, I had a lot less shopping and wrapping to do this year – what with there being fewer people and all.

We did celebrate Christ’s birth with festivities and gifts for the children. We put up a tree, but did not send out cards. We attended church each Sunday of Advent and gave thanks for our many blessings we do have. We kept out of the hustle-and-bustle for the most part, and kept Christmas what it’s supposed to be; a simple celebration of life and family.

Once again it is time to look forward to a new year. I can honestly say I have a lot of optimism and hope to move forward. The children are happy and healthy and we really do have everything going for us. Paul’s business is picking up more and more everyday, even in this tough economy. I have my job, my health, my family… I need to just pick up and move on.

I want to start working on some hobbies again. Maybe I’ll really dive into sewing, since I loved that at one time. Maybe I’ll pick up the guitar again and start plucking away. Don’t worry though, I plan to stay away from singing! I suppose I should start exercising too. That’s what healthy people do, right?

Most importantly, I need to start reaching out to more people and making time for friends. I fill my life with work and the kids and don’t focus enough on developing outside relationships. It’s a typical mom-mistake. I suppose I need to start by apologizing for being such a recluse. Forgive me for not calling/writing/talking!

Forgiving is truly the only way to move forward after all. I plan to move forward now and keep looking forward.

A Musical Note

2008-11-23T16:32:00.000-08:00

Photo from a really long time ago...

I'm just experimenting a bit here to see if I can upload an audio file to blogger. In 2000-2002, Paul and I were great friends with a musician named Ben Mallory. He enlisted our musical tallent (well, Paul's tallent and my... musical help!) to put out some Irish Folk Music CD's. We travelled around rural MN playing at coffee houses, county fairs and some private engagements. Some may even remembering coming to see us at Rochesterfest! Ok, so we never made it big time, but we had a lot of fun.

The following song features Ben Mallory on guitar and vocals and me on the bodhran (drum) and female accompanying vocal. Enjoy if this works!...

If you can't get the embedded tool thing to work, just click on this link if you want to listen!

Thou Shall Not Covet Thy Neighbor's Manservant

2008-11-18T06:51:00.000-08:00

Last month, Brigid worked very hard in her 1st grade class project to memorize all of the 10 Commandments. I admit, I didn’t even have them memorized myself, so it’s been educational for me as I helped her as well! We got through the first few pretty smoothly, but hit a snag at the whole “Thou shall not commit adultery” thing.

This is not first grade material!

I explained what it meant, sans the whole sex thing, and Brigid pretty much understood and went on. This surprised me from a girl who could cripple me to my knees with all the Why? Why? Why?’s on everything when she was just a bit younger.

The one that really stumped her was #10

“Thou shalt not covet thy neighbour's house; thou shalt not covet thy neighbour's wife, nor his manservant, nor his maidservant, nor his ox, nor his ass, nor any thing that is thy neighbour's.”

The questions poured in about all things thou shalt not be coveting! She was particularly interested in the whole servant idea, and I told her it was a person who lived in the house and had to do everything they were told. I was glad she was more interested in this one than the adultery topic, since it’s a lot easier to explain, however, I may not have done a very good job…

Fast forward a couple months to last Sunday morning. We ran into her teacher and her husband on the way to Sunday school. I had never met her teacher’s husband, and Brigid proudly introduced him to me. “That’s Mr. B! That’s Mrs. B’s manservant!”

Whoops! “Husband Brigid! Husband!” Of course Mrs. B understood the mix-up, since she is the one teaching the children the commandments. I would hate for her to think that we're teaching the children that husband and manservant could be used interchangeably.

One thing’s for certain though. I will be referring to Paul as my “manservant” from now on.

A 6-year-old's perspective on death

2008-11-11T18:42:00.000-08:00

Brigid was in her back-seat booster-seat this morning, as usual, on our ½ hour commute to school. As usual, she happily chatted about one topic or another, and I only half listened to her discussion about something about flowers and candles as I tried to catch up on election coverage on NPR for the eight-thousandth day in a row. Suddenly I turned off the radio and asked her to repeat what she was telling me. She happily answered me. “Oh, I’m just telling you what kind of box I want my body placed in when I get to die and my body is burned to ashes.”

Don’t get me wrong, death is not a taboo topic in our household, and never has been. Paul makes his living drafting wills and managing probates after all. But I’m not ready to hear my six year old describe what kind of casket or cremation box she plans to be buried in. It’s a bit, I don’t know, young to worry about that?!

Death, death and death. That has been the total focus of our family for the past year and a half. If we go back 5 years in fact, there’s a whole laundry list of losses. My mother’s parents, my grandparents, died in 2004 and 2006. Brigid looks through relatively recent photo books of family all around us, and every single person in the book, except for our immediate family, is gone. It’s like a holocaust of sorts just hit our family. Her beloved nana even dropped dead in front of her when she was four. How do you explain all of the missing people from the photobooks?

Grandpa Gerry holding Brigid -

Grandma Bev holding Brigid- Grace holding Brigid - Dad holding Brigid - Mom holding Brigid -
My explanations have gotten better since the time when she was two and we had to put our pet cat, Sammy to sleep. Back then, we just told her Sammy “went to the doctor” and felt no need to explain more than that. I learned the hard way that honesty with kids is the best policy, when she asked me for the next year and a half why Sammy hadn’t returned and why couldn’t we just go get him? I also told her one day that I was going to the doctor’s and she nearly turned white with fear that she would never see me again!

We’re keeping things as simple, yet detailed as possible. Dying is just your heart stops beating and you quit breathing. She understands heaven is where your soul resides after your body dies. I even put a glove on my hand and described it as our body, and our hand is our soul. When your body dies (take off the glove), we can discard it, but the soul lives on forever.

She listens to our explanations, and happily takes it all in, as if we’re explaining to her that dad goes to the office everyday. “Death isn’t sad mom, because everybody is up there in heaven just waiting for us. Daddy’s mom and dad and your mom and dad are there waiting, someday you will be waiting for me too!” As an adult, it’s hard for me to see it as simple as I explain it, but I really really want to see it so simply as well. Everybody just sitting up there, around the dinner table, waiting for us to walk in the door and sit down to supper. We’ll all catch up on old times together and laugh about the good times, while we wait around for everyone else to get there.

That’s a good enough image for now.

Fighting Spirit

2008-10-31T05:59:00.000-07:00

I wrote a a few words to say for mom's funeral this past Wed, like I did for Dad's funeral back in July. Writing is the one thing that has always helped me put my thoughts together and feel better, and I want to share my thoughts on mom...

Fighting Spirit

Thank you everyone for coming today. There’s nothing more healing in times of sorrow than love shared by friends and family.

To think of someone’s life ending at just 61 years feels far too short and a tragedy. In so many ways the loss is a tragedy to many of us, but 61 years is also an incredible blessing. As many of you know, Mary was Bev and Gerry’s first born child, and she arrived much to early for the doctors to think she had any chance of survival. It was 1947, and she came into this world weighing just over 3lbs. She was baptized right in the hospital and in a way, given her “last rites” and handed back to her grief-stricken parents to say good-bye.

Obviously we know that is not how the story of her life ended. She not only lived, but she thrived and went on to touch the lives of all of us here today. In perspective, 61 years doesn’t seem like such a tragedy.

Mom has, from the very beginning, always had a fighting spirit. Some may have considered her a bit stubborn at times. I can tell you I owe my life to that stubborn fighting spirit of hers. When she was pregnant with me, she started to bleed heavily and was told by the doctors that she would miscarry. For six straight months she stayed on complete bed-rest, fighting to keep the baby that her body was trying to reject, while at the same time trying to care for her 4 year old son. Things got so bad that she even suffered a mild stroke and other ailments, but she still kept fighting for her baby… and that’s why I stand here today, thanks to her amazing spirit.

Of course, she never did let me forget the pain and agony she went through for me…

I was just 15 years old when mom was first diagnosed with stage II breast cancer at the young age of 42. Those were very scary times, especially when her initial liver enzyme tests also came back with concerning numbers, and her prognosis was appearing rather grim. When we later learned that the liver test was a false positive. Her fighting spirit to live came back stronger than ever! After suffering through a mastectomy, the doctors told her that it was her choice whether or not to continue with therapy. To her there was no choice as she insisted on fighting the cancer with all her strength! She fought through the weakness, nausea, hair loss and other side effects of chemo and radiation to be certain she destroyed every last cancer cell in her body. She told me she had a follow-up appointment just this year where her cancer scans remained clear to this day.

Sometimes it takes life’s darkest moments for the light of love to come shining through. It was at this time when she and John came together and were married here in this chapel in 1993. There’s no question that being with John was what gave mom a reason to keep fighting as her body weakened in recent years. The past year she has been unable to even leave home without a great deal of assistance, she never complained because home was where the love of her life was, and the only place she really wanted to be.

Unfortunately, her heart finally gave out on Friday and she finally lost her fight, but I feel blessed to have had mom around as long as we did. She was able to walk with me down the aisle when I was married, and she was right there with me during the birth of my first child. Rarely a week has gone by when we haven’t spoken for an hour or more on the phone in the past 5 years.

I hope everyone here today can reflect on how blessed we have been to have had mom in our lives, and let that help ease the sorrow of loosing her so young. I know it’s a bit of a cliché, but her spirit does continue to live within all of us that she touched, and will continue to live in the generations that follow.

Gone From Our Sight

2008-10-25T18:16:00.000-07:00

Mary Strand - 2/24/47 - 10/24/08

For anyone who hasn't heard yet, we lost mom yesterday to a sudden heart attack. Unlike dad who was diagnosed with cancer and died rather suddenly a short time later, her's has been a laundry list of lingering illnesses for many years. In fact, she was a breast cancer survivor starting in her early 40's and fought an amazing battle for years to remain on earth. She was a prisoner in her broken body for too many years, and she is truly set free now.

I was looking through my email today and found this little poem she sent to me just after dad died in June. She said someone gave it to her at her dad's funeral. I think it sums it up nicely for now.

GONE FROM OUR SIGHT

I am standing upon the seashore. A ship at my side spreads her white sails to the morning breeze and starts for the blue ocean. She is an object of beauty and strength. I stand and watch her until at length; she hangs like a speck of white cloud, just where the sea and sky come to mingle with each other.

Then, someone at my side says: "There, she is gone!"

"Gone where?"

Gone from my sight. That is all. She is just as large in mast and hull and spar as she was when she left my side and she is just as able to bear her load of living freight to her destined port.

Her diminished size is in me, not in her. And just at the moment when someone at my side says: "There. She is gone!", there are other eyes watching her coming, and other voices ready to take up the glad shout: "Here she comes!"

And that is dying.

Henry Van Dyke

Why I Have Gray Hair

2008-10-03T23:09:00.000-07:00

It's been awhile since I've had a posting about the kids. Really, they are what got this whole blog going, so, you wonder… why haven't I posted much about Aidan and his preschool experience?

Ok, here's the deal. Four year old… preschool… pretty standard stuff, right? Lets just say it hasn't been all A B C's around here.

It started out simply with a call now and then from school like I posted about last year. What was mildly funny at first, quickly became very not funny as the calls continued and we were asked nicely to offer Aidan some other educational opportunities.

Yes, my four year old was kicked out of preschool.

Let me just say, nothing says "Parent of the Year" better than packing up your child's things from a school after he's been kicked out for misbehaving. I really thought I couldn't feel any lower until… it happened again. You see, we tried another school, a special Montessori school even, and it only last two weeks before the director called me at home and asked me (not so nicely) not to bring my child in the next day, or ever.

In Aidan's defense, I do blame this school at least partly for overreacting and making some situations worse at times. For instance, I was called one day because Aidan was "using his fingers as a weapon and shooting at other children." Huh?! It turns out, he was just playing Spider Man and was pretending to shoot webs, but still, he was punished and I was called for that? We're talking about a 3-4 year old boy here! I was then informed that he was an "unremorseful child" because he wouldn't say he was sorry (when being punished for something he had no idea he did wrong). Overkill much?

But Aidan is, and has always been, a ball of fire! I know he's "that one child" in the class of 15+ that every teacher dreads. The disruptive one. The defiant one. The one that takes extra effort in a class with already over-extended resources.

Well, at least I always have stories to tell my grandma to make her laugh. She was a school teacher for 40 years, and nothing got her laughing harder than when I had to pick up Aidan one day because he had bitten his teacher… in the butt. She had bent over after taking a toy away from him, so she was kind of asking for it, right? Or the time in church when Aidan started singing "Hi Ho the Dairy-O! There's a Poopy In The Pool!" at the top of his lungs when the pastor told us to have a moment of silence (always my most fearful statement with Aidan around.) Or when he got his head stuck in a railing at a restaurant.

Over the summer we worked really hard with Aidan to overcome his "problems." He's just really really spirited and demanding. He is bright, lively, funny and an extremely outgoing happy child! He actually has an amazing attention span and can color or paint for up to an hour or more.

I was so disappointed that the other schools were so willing to just give up on him and boot him out into the cold! I know he's a challenge, but he's also a child with two parents who are working desperately hard everyday with him and will do anything to help him succeed! We've used positive discipline, mixed with an appropriate amount of NEGATIVE reinforcement as well, and have really smothered him with as much attention as any child could want.

The good news - Preschool #3 seems to be doing the trick! The teachers are fan-freaking-tastic at this new school! There's a big sign on the wall that says "All children are capable of success!" Thank you!! The new school offers the children LOTS of physical activity and lots of outside time, which is really key for a very active boy. I have talked for hours with his teacher and was very up front on day one what his challenges are. She didn't seem phased and was pleased when I instructed her not to let him get away with anything and to set very strict guidelines and boundaries with him, so he knows exactly what's expected of him. That has been another key to working with him. Aidan can sniff out weakness in a guardian a mile away and he tests every limit he can find, and they've done a wonderful job really reeling him in.

He's been at his new school for two months now, and he's already learned more in that time than a year anywhere else! He does have his occasional bad days, although they're very few compared to before. For instance, I did get a call on Friday because he had decided to take off all his clothes and was refusing to get dressed. Yes, I had to go pick up my naked child from preschool.

As usual, I ask myself, why is it always my child?

All this drama, and we haven't even hit Kindergarten yet.

Forever Home

2008-09-28T21:27:00.000-07:00

It's been a little over three months now since dad passed on, and this week the realtor put the for-sale sign in the front yard of his house. 30+ years of my childhood-growing-into adulthood are on the market for any stranger to take over. There's really no other choice, and we do want it to sell, but there's a part of me that is secretly happy the housing market is so incredibly bad. Part of me that hopes we just can't sell our childhood home and we can just keep it, unchanged. Never growing old. Never dying.

All of us managed over the past few months to get the place emptied out and ready to be looked at. Furniture and items have been given away, spread around, and stored away. Boxes of books, papers and memories are stored up in Paul's mom's garage. Another house just sitting empty, with it's owner's unfortunate early demise. Carpet ripped up, drapes pulled down, and walls washed of the years of smoke. We hired some people to paint and fix and make the place look livable, and not just lived in. The new is not in yet, but we're still letting people at least have a peek and see if there's any interest in the old place.

And by old place, I really do mean old. This is the house that Craig and I grew up in, yet until we're trying to sell it, there's so much I didn't know. I knew the place was by far the oldest house in the neighborhood, and I had even heard it was once an old farm house, that is now smack dab in the middle of the city. But we found out it was actually built pre 1910, which is as far as the records go back. The house is not built with today's conveniences. It has character galore, but most people would prefer modern design. I must admit, the creaky narrow stairs that I fell down several times as a child are no luxury, nor is the fact there are 3 bedrooms upstairs and only 1 bathroom downstairs. We are trying to price it to sell, but it's a goofy old place to say the least.

There is no central air, and the place is heated by radiators in each room. We even had a wood burning stove in the living room for extra heat during those long cold winters. Wisconsin summers pale in comparasin to Arizona ones, but it does get hot and humid enough to need air conditioning as well, so big ugly window units have to make due.

Growing up, during the summers, mom always had a big garden out back, and in the fall we'd spend every weekend canning the fruits and vegetables to keep down in the basement cellar. With the economy as bad as it is, I'm so grateful for our survival training childhood! You never know how much of it we'll need to get back to in the upcoming years. Even the plants of our childhoods are still growing around the house, in the same places we planted them. Dad never had the heart to kill off the tiger lilies that took over the side of the house each year, or the ivy that grew all over the house so much, the place practically looked abandoned by fall. I bet if we looked hard enough, we'd even find some tart rhubarb plants still growing by the garage.

There is no point in living in the past, but it is fun to remember the good times. I hope a new family moves in and can start new memories of their own.

The Law's The Law

2008-09-21T21:49:00.000-07:00

So I was driving home one evening last week after picking Brigid up after work, and we came across this big protest on the intersection of Scottsdale Rd and Shea Blvd! A bunch of dudes were marching around with signs protesting against the cameras that catch people speeding and running red lights. Since they were protesting cameras, I decided to snap a picture of them and post it on my blog for the whole world to see.

Oh the irony! I'm so evil that way!

I'm not really sure what the point is of their protest anyway. I'm all for catching speeders and red light runners myself. I have passed by no less than 3 cameras every single day on my way to work and back since they were installed a couple years ago, and I have yet to get a ticket, because I do a funny thing called follow the rules.

Early last year I posted some funnies about driving in Phoenix and a story about watching someone zoom past me and get "flashed". Maybe the woman who got the ticket was holding one of the protest signs.

I might add, although I have never been caught speeding, my husband has been mailed his picture along with a heafty fine. He was good and sucked it up and spent 1/2 a Saturday in traffic-school to get the ticket reduced. No whining on his part!

Speaking of Paul and the law, I want to direct you over to his new blog! It's all about true stories from his own experience and research on dealing with handling people's estates after they die. He's been writing about the famous (i.e. Health Ledger) and more personal stories of the troubles people run into who do not plan for the unplanned. And may I say from my totally honest and un-biased point of view, it's a really interesting read!

There's a Bear in that Cave

2008-09-01T07:28:00.001-07:00

We made a quick weekend getaway on Saturday up to Sedona, AZ. There are shops and restuarants and spas by the thousands, but none of that mattered. There were paths to hike and rocks to explore! Call me crazy, but I'd much rather take a stroll through the woods than along a hot dusty sidewalk full of shops to take my money. Even the kids agreed and had one of the "best days of my life" as Brigid elloquently put it. Me too!

Photo Sharing - Video Sharing - Photo Printing - Photo Books

Ch Ch Ch Ch Ch Chaaaanges...

2008-08-04T21:26:00.000-07:00

It's time for a new hobby! I may work full time and not have a lot of extra time on my hands, but there's always a part of me that still wants to be crafty. At least I like to think about gardening, scrapbooking, baking and other fun and light-hearted tasks I don't get to do enough of.

There's also the drumming lessons I'll be starting on Friday as well, but that will just have to be another post!!

Nothing beats depressing times and circumstances like diving into a new hobby. Actually, I'm diving into a very old hobby. Pictured here is my mom's sewing machine she gave me years ago that I spent many hours and days as a small child stitching together little pillows and doll clothes. I even made a duffle bag and skirt in Home Economics class in middle school (I don't want any comments left from anyone younger than 30 asking what Home Economics is either…)

So this weekend I dragged out the old (old old old) sewing machine that has been gathering dust in my linen closet. Couldn't be that hard could it? How do you thread this thing again? Lets see.. it goes through the little notch on the top, around the cirlcle thing, down to the hook thing, back up through the two holes, through the two other hook things, through the needle and under the foot! Got it!

Wait!

There's the bobbin that has to be threaded and come up from underneath. How did that go again? WHERE'S THE MANUAL ANYWAY???

After four hours of messing with the blasted machine (that frankly was invented to save women time), I just couldn't do it. I couldn't get the 1967 era Singer machine to come to life. Either my stitches were so loose they fell apart, or so tight the thread broke right on the machine.

Internet here I come! I searched the Singer site and every sewing site I could find, but all I could find were sites willing to sell the manual for upwards of $30. Until I ran across a single posting by a nice woman named Laura who keeps a nifty sewing blog here. She said she would give her manual away to anyone who could provide a picture of said 1967 Singer 690u sewing machine. What a bargain! Thus the picture taken, and nice Laura said she will send me her manual! I will definitely have to pay that one forward some day.

So what am I working on? A little re-decorating for the "toy area". We live in a small house and have 2 little kids, so some of their larger things have encroached out into our living area. I'm sick of looking at them, so we've build some shelves and spent the day at Ikea coming up with some solutions. I picked out the psychedelic looking fabric and am trying to simply sew a hem around it and attach it to the table Paul built for Aidan's trains. It's in progress now, but I'll let you know how it finally turns out.

Many changes in our home are occurring this month, along with the new decorating. Brigid will be starting 1st grade at her new school next week, and Aidan will be starting his new preschool. Many changes in the household, but we're hoping for the best. No time for us to be all nostalgic and looking at the past anymore. For all my sadness of losses, I just need to focus on a bright and happy future with those we love.

Final Word

2008-07-08T07:07:00.000-07:00

We are still here up at our home-away-from-home in MN for a few more days, wrapping up affairs and visiting with family. Dad's funeral was on July 3rd, and now we're busy cleaning out his house and taking care of paperwork. None of it is fun, but all needs to be done.

In the meantime, I wanted to post the words that I spoke at my dad's funeral. I did manage to say everything without totally breaking down, but I did crack a few times.

_______________________________________________________

We are here today to celebrate Rod's life and what he meant to each and every one of us. This isn't an easy thing for any of us to do, but as Rod's daughter, it feels next to impossible. Writing dad's obituary and hearing his life summed up into a group of words doesn’t feel like it could possibly capture what Dad’s life meant to so many people. There really aren’t enough words in the whole English language that could express how much Dad meant to so many people.

Dad had such a deep and caring soul that touched so many people in different ways. He was a loving and caring dad to me and Craig, "papa" to his grandchildren, and uncle Rod to his neices. He was also a deeply caring and loving son to his mother, who is also here with us today. I've had so many people share with me this past week examples and stories of his constant generosity and how he would always drop everything on a moment’s notice if anyone had a need he could help with. He was such a close special friend to many people that he spent his days with and I've heard over and over again how so many people have a hole left in their hearts after losing Rod. I of course am one of them.

The last conversation I had with dad was on Father’s Day this year, just a few days before he suddenly and unexpectedly passed away. We only spoke for about 10 minutes because he grew tired easily, and honestly I don’t remember the details of our conversation. As usual, I told him the latest and funniest stories about the kids, since I was hoping to take his mind off his suffering and have a few laughs. Of course, I’ve known for the last few months that each conversation we had could potentially be our last – and isn’t that really the case with everyone in our life? But I really did not expect that would be the last time I would hear his voice alive.

So it got me thinking… if I had really known for sure that that conversation would be our last, would’ve I said something different? Would’ve I come up with more profound and final words?

No, I don’t think so.

The best memories, in fact most of the memories I have with my dad, had nothing to do with the words that were said between us. As a child, I was always happy just to have him in the same room with me as I watched old re-run Bugs Bunny cartoons. We kids could always count on dad to sit and laugh right along with us at the Road Runner and Daffy Duck antics. If we were lucky, he might tell us stories from his childhood how he would watch not only the cartoons we were watching on television, but westerns like the Lone Ranger and Gunsmoke, or other kids’ shows like Howdy Doody. But mostly just being a dad who would sit with us kids and laugh at old cartoons is a memory I’ll always have with me cherish.

Dad loved to drive and he and I took many road trips together on holidays when we’d go to visit our family on the other side of the state. Again, I don’t remember any deep or profound conversations that we had while driving, but I do remember all the fun that we would have. When I was little, it would make me laugh when he drove over the “rumble strips” while coming to a stop-sign, so after crossing the busy intersection, dad would porously drive on the wrong side of the road to hit more rumble strips, just to get me to laugh some more! And lets not forget all the singing we did along to the Oldies station. As we drove across the state, he always knew exactly which cites had Oldies stations and where to tune into them! Because of dad, I was the only kid in High School who could sing along to every Buddy Holly or Righteous Brothers melody.
When I was in college, I spent half a year studying abroad in China. It was very difficult at the time to try to contact home by telephone, so I was thrilled when I got letters from home from dad. In fact, I’m pretty sure it’s the only time in my life he ever wrote something to me. I searched and searched this week to find the letters that he wrote to me, but I couldn't find them; however, I don't need them since I remember exactly what he wrote to me? Why? Because dad sent a letter to me across the world that cost several dollars and took two weeks to arrive, and consisted of exactly three sentences!

"I miss you. The weather here is nice. I hope you're having fun and come home soon. Love, Dad. "

I'm sure many people in this room today could easily come up with stories about how dad made them laugh or how generous he could be in times of need.

One thing that really sticks out in most of our minds about dad is that he wouldn't want us all somber and sad remembering him. Dad had a light heart even in the worst of times, and always knew how to lighten the mood of any situation. Unlike myself, dad was a man a few words, and he wanted people to be happy and comfortable around him, so he joked around and usually stayed away from the serious.

As for me, the greatest legacy that dad left with me was the simplicity of the love in our relationship. There were no complex, unsaid feelings between us, so even if he left us suddenly, I'm not left wth "if I had only said" regrets. Our conversation ended with us each telling each other "I love you". I’ve tried to express some words to explain our relationship, but I think I could best sum it up simply -

"Dad, I miss you. The weather here is nice. I hope you're having fun. Love, Tina."

The Red Phone

2008-06-24T14:32:00.000-07:00

Hello my dear friends and readers of this blog (if you’re reading this, you’re my friend… awwww). I’m safe and sound up in the woods of rural Minnesota, enjoying the temps in the lower 80’s instead of the high of 115 from that place I just left.

After finding out on Thursday evening that dad had passed away, I had Paul help me change my July 2nd airline tickets to come up here to June 21st. I spend all day Friday packing my and the kids’ bags and settle all my affairs to be away from home for 3 weeks. Everything has happened so suddenly that I am still trying to figure out where exactly I am from moment to moment!

A lot of people think I’m totally out of my mind to take my 3 and 5 year olds with me, by myself, across the country like this; but, I knew when we’d arrive that there would be family up here to help and I’m not alone. And really, everyone wants to see the kids and not boring old me after all. It’s nice to bring some happiness up with me, especially since the kids are too young to even experience grief over what has just occurred.

My travels did go well and the kids were on their best behavior. I think the stars and moon must’ve aligned on Saturday to create a day when they were actually behaving and in good spirits. Either that or they sensed that mom had about 5 hours of sleep in 48 hours and was at stress level of a nuclear warhead - they didn’t want to be picking up that red phone.

Those of you who know me, know I can take pretty much anything and remain completely calm on the surface. Below the surface I may have molten hot lava building for eons, and it’s not pretty when it finally erupts and I let it go. So imagine how I was on Saturday, after traveling across the country for 12+ hours, completely grief-stricken, on very little sleep with two young children, and had remained totally calm all day. Eventually something was going to give.

We landed at Gate ONE (I’ll let you guess out of how many) at the La Crosse Airport on our little trubo-prop airplane. Aidan fell into a deep sleep the moment the tires hit the pavement, after not one teeny tiny little nap all day. Everyone on the plane turned around and said “why is it so quiet all of a sudden? Where’s that constant little chatterbox?” It took me quite awhile to get all of us all the plane, with me carrying the finally sleeping Aidan, all our bags, and ushering Brigid down the aisle. I carried him outside immediately where Stacey (my brother’s wife) was waiting on the curb with her van. I got Aidan put in the carseat, and Brigid mentioned she had to go to the bathroom. So the two of us went back in and I saw our bags had not come out yet. No problem.

I took Brigid into the bathroom and as I was washing my hands, I heard the buzzer sound that the bags were on the conveyer. Since the bathroom is right outside the luggage area and we were in a very small airport, I told Brigid to finsh up and meet me outside so I could get our bags. I emerged from the bathroom and saw our 3 suitcases rolling around the conveyer and went over to grab them, but didn’t quite get there in time before they went back behind a curtain. The conveyer belt is a semi-circle that was still turning, so I waited for them to come out the other side again. They never did!

I stuck my head behind the curtain and my bags were not there! The airport was completely deserted and I started to panic! I sent Brigid out to the van and searched around for any airport employee and finally found a lady behind a counter. I nicely and calmly told her what happened and she said lazily “Oh. You have to be there when your bags arrive or they take them back.” WHAT?! How could I get them? She suggested that maybe I go to the very other end of the airport where there was an un-manned desk with a buzzer and maybe I could find someone to help me, but it was airport policy not to let bags sit out, and if you’re not there to get your bags then you have to get them from security.

Now… she had just dialed me up on the big RED phone.

I de-freaking-MANDED that she get herself back to security and find me someone that instant to get me my luggage, or get me a number that I could talk to someone, but she was enjoying her position of power and wouldn’t budge. The more upset and unglued I became, the happier the look on her smug little face. “Airport policy. Sorry.” She was truly enjoying herself and I was getting nowhere.

I made my way to the end of the airport and found the magic buzzer, where I proceeded to lay on it continuously for several minutes. I was about to barge behind the door, when Mr. Security finally emerged. I suppose he was only doing his job, but he opened the door to a completely unglued nuclear explosion in progress, demanding he get her luggage out this instant! Throughout all of this, I am proud to say that I refrained from using profanities by the way. He was also enjoying his powerful La Crosse Airport Security job and gave me the same speech about my luggage, but added that he couldn’t give them to me due to HOMELAND SECURITY.
Excuse me?

I’d like to take this moment to let that sink in. This is a perfect example of somebody throwing around their weight and power in the name of Homeland Security. That all-encompassing policy that allows anyone in the smallest amount of authority to play big-bad-cop. Yes, my friends, this is the world we now live in. I couldn’t get my bags because I allowed my 5 year old to pee. This wasn’t Chicago. This wasn’t New York. This was teeny tiny nothing airport in rural Wisconsin.

In the end, Mr. Protecting Society from Terrorism brought me my luggage, about ½ hour after I first screaming at him. I shouted at him that I have traveled to just about every major airport in this country and several around the world, and have never had anyone treat me so ridiculously poorly before. You see, even if I had been standing right there to fetch my bags, there’s no way I could’ve gotten all 3 large bags off the conveyer in the time they allowed them to circle around the tiny belt anyway.
Welcome home to La Crosse, WI. And they wonder why they don’t have much tourism here?

At least I got some of that "steam" out of my system. Now onto the tasks of funeral-planning and wrapping-up of affairs, that we are quickly becoming experts at doing. I'll take my silver linings wherever I can find them!

Rodney Sheffield: 1946-2008

2008-06-20T14:39:00.000-07:00

Dad passed away peacefully in his sleep this afternoon, 6/19/08.

He was diagnosed with lung cancer nearly a year ago (shortly after this photo) and had been doing very well until recently. I haven't "blogged" much about it out of respect for his privacy, but his health has been heavily on our minds since he was diagnosed. I had a great conversation with him on Sunday and he specifically said he was at peace with what he knew was to come.

He fought a brave battle and it just became too much for him. We knew the end would be coming, but it still was rather sudden and unexpected to happen just like that. He had just started Hospice care on Sat, and when I spoke to his nurse she said he was doing well and she expected to be caring for him for at least several months. Sadly, we had planned a trip home in just 2 weeks, expecting him to still be hanging in there, but it was not meant to be. The world is truly a sadder place without his kind and wonderful soul in it, but we are happy for him that he no longer is suffering and passed on before things got any worse for him.

I will travel tomorrow with the children and we will stay at Grace's house, that we still have kept all this time. We haven't made any official plans yet and Craig and Stacy are waiting for me to get there so we can make decisions that need to be made. I have so many thank-yous to give out.

Dad, I love you so much and so many people will miss you. I really mean it when I say the world is a sadder place without you.

The Hair Q & A

2008-06-02T21:24:00.001-07:00

I’m not one to get too hung up on body image, and I try very hard not to define myself or anyone else by what the media portrays as “perfect”. Yes, I try to accept my thick thighs, flabby twice-pregnant tummy, big nose and chin for what they are and who I am! But with my hair, I’ve never felt like I’ve had to accept anything. I’ve always loved my long wavy dark-brown locks…

Er… that’s right. I said it. Dark brown. Wavy. I know you’re thinking. “If you love your dark brown wavy hair, what’s up with the straight blond locks covering your skull for the past year?!”

Believe it or not, I’ve gotten a lot of questions and comments (on-line and in real life) about my hair and it’s color lately. One that was most interesting to me came from a coworker who has known me for the past year and a half. He looked at my original employee ID badge picture that was taken 3 years ago and commented “you used to have dark hair?” He actually thought all along that I'm a natural blond! Ha! My closest friends and family have been eyeing me with skepticism. Tina? Going blond? It must be that Arizona place going to her head...

Not exactly. I’m going to be honest with you all here. Anyone who knows me well knows that I'm extremely practical and one to follow silly trends, and no, I haven’t suddenly changed. I’ve joked around that I’m trying to see if blonds really do have more fun. I haven’t decided that yet.

So here’s the truth people. The horrible horrible truth:

See my roots people? I’m gray! Tina has gone TOTALLY gray! For those of you reading here who went to high school with me, and are maybe seeing a white hair popping up here and there on your own head, I’m here to tell you that what's happened to me is much worse! That's not a little "salt and pepper" up there, now is it?? I have mentioned in previous posts how important my hair is to me, so the loss of my color has been very sad indeed!

My beautiful deep brown frocks are forever history and I've turned silver. Silver! It started pretty drastically about this time last year, and has been progressing ever since. My hair has always grown really fast, and when it decided it was done producing color, it has been coming out pure gray in leaps and bounds!

From Web MD:
"Premature graying is genetically determined for the most part," David Bank, MD, tells WebMD. Bank is director of the Center for Dermatology, Cosmetic, and Laser Surgery in Mount Kisco , N.Y. "Graying is natural. We all do it eventually."
When more than half the hair is white by age 40, though, this is considered "premature."

I’m 34. Thirty Four! Yes, I'd call that premature, thankyouverymuch! I’ve noticed gray hair since I was in my early 20’s, so I've known for awhile that I would likely gray early. I had hoped I'd keep my color a few more years. Trauma from the past year or just genes, or a mixture of both, I’ll never really know. All I know is my natural look is now that of a 50 year old. Fortunately, the article from Web MD linked above says that going gray early doesn’t mean a person is aging any earlier or that it’s a problem at all. In fact, it’s a blessing according to the Bible!

Proverbs 16:31 - A gray head is a crown of glory; It is found in the way of righteousness

I'm not ready to be righteous yet. I'm just not. I could dye my hair back to it's former color, but as long as I'm dying, I might as well try new things. Plus, it's much more practical to go blond when your hair has lost it's dark color. It keeps longer and blends in better.

And maybe it's a little more fun.

How Is It Possible?

2008-05-21T21:45:00.000-07:00

Let me see now, where do I have a picture of Brigid to post to my blog? Oh here's one from just the other day…

That was just the other day wasn't it? Because I swear that picture was taken just last week, or maybe a month ago. Oh wait, here is a more recent one…

Certainly that was just yesterday. It feels just like yesterday.

How can those sweet little pigtails be growing into long stylish locks? How can the day ever come when her love of all things My Little Pony is beginning to wane? How is it that the little sprite who was just learning her alphabet suddenly read me a book? When did I stop counting teeth coming in and start counting teeth coming out? (Three so far!) Worst of all, how is it possible that…

Kindergarten is finished?!

She had her "graduation" ceremony tonight, and all I could do was watch her babyhood take one more official step towards growing up. I love her every step of the way, but I'm not ready to be done with little baby Brigid.

Hi Ya!

2008-05-04T07:56:00.001-07:00

That's right! We've got our own little Karate Kid in the making right here. Paul wants to start early on ensuring Brigid will be able to fend off all the male pursuers in the future.

Paul's signed up for classes as well, so beware future dates of Brigid!

Seriously, we decided to enroll Brigid in a Karate school near our house because it's such a great way to not only get in exercise, but teach lifelong discipline, confidence and self-defense. I have to admit, I love the fact that it's not so "girly". It kind of balances out all the Barbies and *shudder* Brats that she obsesses herself with. I can't help but feel that little girl dance and gym classes (and "cheer" – yes I've seen 5 year old cheer classes) are half who's-the-prettiest-girl classes along with teaching any skills.

She's actually taken to it extremely well! I will never forget the class where the big, black-belt sensei (teacher) bellowed out to the class of 3-5 year old "now everybody drop and give me 10! Go!" I thought my delicate flower might wither into tears, but she dropped right on the spot and started doing push-ups! I didn't even know she knew how to do push-ups! Clearly I need to learn these techniques of the sensei…

Karate may seem more suited to our little wild child, Aidan, and since he's almost 4, he could be placed in the class. However, he still isn't taking directions well, and he's more likely to be climbing the walls than dropping and giving 10 of anything. He does need lots (and lots and lots) of practice at participating in class and following directions however, so we signed him up for…
Gymnastics!

He did his first class on Wed evening. I brought Brigid along with me and we watched as Aidan plowed his way into the room and interrupted the beginning of the class by running around the "circle time". The gymnastics teachers are extremely patient and kind, and just let him be his spunky little self. It was a bit distracting when they had to get him down off the balance beam (twice) and off the parallel bars, but they claimed they were happy to have such an eager little beaver full of energy in their class. Aidan rolled and tumbled for about 5 minutes, when he decided he was done and out the door he went.

UGH!

That's when we noticed the class was for 3-5 year olds, and Brigid was right here with me. I asked Brigid if she would go in with Aidan and help him out. Of course she was dying to participate! As soon as she went in the room, Aidan was right on her footsteps as always.

It was at this moment I suddenly realized that Brigid is the only person on the planet who can keep Aidan in line! She can do what none of us have been able to do and get Aidan to sit down and participate! Who knew? So now Brigid is enrolled in gymnastics as well, although she is almost 6 so a little big for this class.

This is where parenting starts to get expensive, isn't it?

The Simple Life

2008-04-01T22:33:00.000-07:00

My apologies for my long hiatus from blog documenting. I really don’t have any good excuse for not writing, other than I’ve been taking a mental break. 2007 was quite the year, and this one has so far turned out to be quite tame in comparison. Sorry if I worried anyone coming here to see how we are! No news has been good news.

Dad is still fighting a valiant fight against the cancer monster. It’s been so great we’ve had time to already visit a couple times this year! Chemo is the worst part, and he’s on his third round right now, but it is showing to be effective in fighting back! Praise God for that! It really goes to show that when things look their gloomiest, never give up hope and faith that miracles do happen.
I was looking back at my blog and looking at all of the exciting travels and places we have seen in the last year. How exciting exhausting! The past month or so we’ve enjoyed peace and simplicity. Frankly, doing a bunch of nothing has felt like pure bliss to our tired over-worked souls.

We’ve had time to enjoy some weekends with friends. Here are some pictures of the kids on a recent visit to our friends Ann and Keith’s house. We walked over to a local park by their house and just watched the kids run through the field and roll down a hill. We’ve enjoyed simple dinners together and just sitting and talking. For a full set of the day’s pictures, visit the “Ann’s Website” link at the side of my page.

On Sunday evening of this past week, Brigid begged us to do a picnic at the park. It was about 4pm and we hadn’t planned anything, so Paul ran to the store and picked up some “brats” and charcoal! We threw a cooler together and dragged out the picnic tableware and off we went! There is a small neighborhood park a few blocks away that has grills and picnic tables, although I honestly never see anyone actually using them. Most people probably have their own grills at home, but there’s something magical to kids (ok, and me) about grilling out at the park!

To those of you reading who are still dealing with snow, take heart! When you’re at your July picnics, it will be 120 here and we will be instantly fried to the picnic table if we try to have a picnic here.

Paul thought to bring along the kites, and as luck would have it, the wind started up. You had to try NOT to fly these kites! Even Aidan had no trouble keeping his kite up in the air, although he had to be constantly reminded not to let it go or it would end up like his ill-fated Red Robin pink-balloon that he cries about daily since it floated away. Oh the traumas of childhood.

There have been no complaints from the kids, since they’re really more interested in doing things together as a family than going on exciting getaways. However, we do have a trip planned in a couple weeks to visit Paul’s cousin and aunt in L.A. We are planning to buy tickets to Knotts Berry Farm and check out the rides and attractions. So much for the simple life – bring on the roller coasters!

Cupcakes and Popcorn

2008-02-26T15:25:00.000-08:00

I was looking at my "Site Meter" today, and I've noticed a trend of visiotrs I've been getting that have been searching for information on Popcorn Cupcakes and landing on my site. What a huge disappointment it must be to find out my site is just named after my goofy nicknames for my kiddos. Little did I know there are actually entire sites dedicated to things like cupcakes and popcorn and... drumroll please... Popcorn Cupcakes! I did a little search myself and found a cute little Blogger site kept by a woman in Milwaukee who has dedicated her site to cupcakes, and has a whole entry just for Popcorn Cupcakes. Please pay her a visit if you have stumbled across my mommyblog in search of something a little more tasty than the goodies offered up here!

http://mkecupcakequeen.blogspot.com/

Companionship

2008-02-17T20:34:00.000-08:00

Brigid and I are about to embark on new adventure this week! Just she and I are going alone to Minnesota for a quick weekend "back home." Like I said in a earlier post, we want to go back and see everyone and check on the house. We need to be sure we can find the house and all our friends under all that snow I've been hearing about. It gets a wee bit expensive to be flying 4 people back and forth across the country multiple times a year! It makes a lot more sense for just one or two of us to go at a time, and make more frequent, yet shorter trips.

Brigid is excited, yet very tentative. She and Aidan are like two little peas in a pod. She wasn't even 2 yet when he was born, and she's never known life without his constant little companionship! She's not sure she wants to go five whole days without her little brother to harass and boss around.

Mind you, it's totally odd that she would complain considering the number of times I've heard her cry "Aidan is not never ever my friend ever again!!" after some playful misdeed, like he was looking at her wrong. For someone who is not "never" her friend ever again, she sure looks around for him when she's got a good fart noise she wants someone to giggle with her over.

Brigid's been training Aidan to be her playmate a little too well for his own good sometimes. It might be good for Aidan to have a little daddy alone time, where they can read dinosaur books and build stuff. Having a strong-willed older sister can have interesting consequences for a little boy. He unfortunately knows as much about the Disney princesses as Brigid does. And he prefers the pink sparkly nail polish…

Not to worry though! Here is Brigid joining Aidan at the train table. With Brigid's assistance, Aidan is learning the fine art of sewing his choo choo sewing card. It's nice when they can find mutually enjoyable activities together.

Things could've been much worse with this picture. Instead of prancing around in a tutu, he's happy just being the musical accompaniment. Every dancer needs her musician after all, and these two make the perfect team!

We do try to balance our activities out and it's not all princesses and make-up around here. Not all the time. Last weekend we went on a tour of the Arizona Diamondbacks dugout and locker room at Family Day at the Ballpark at Chase field! In the true spirit of baseball, they enjoyed the ballpark food more than most of the sporting activities, but who can blame them?

We will miss Aidan on our travels, and everyone will miss seeing him I’m sure. But Brigid will certainly relish in the individual attention that will be lavished upon her. I have to guilty admit I am looking forward to a much quieter plane ride than many we've had in the last year. I'm sure we'll find some way to have fun on our own!

Brigid's Baby

2008-02-05T22:37:00.000-08:00

I haven’t taken the time to write about our travels up north a couple weeks ago, and for that I’m sorry. We really had a wonderful time seeing everyone, and now that I’ve thawed out from the -20 temperatures, I admit we even enjoyed the weather! No, I’m not making that up. It toughens up the ol’ soul! It gives us an excuse to break out the 10 year old sweaters that are now stuffed into the back corners of our closets.

On the first full day after our arrival, I decided to take Brigid down the hill with me into “town” and visit with dad. Aidan and Paul were napping, and having only one kid (the QUIET one) with me would leave more time for conversation! When the two kids are together, there tends to be explosive activity, but when they are separated they tend to behave. It’s boring just hanging with with us grown-ups.

In Brigid’s 5 years, I realized she had never actually been to dad’s house, at least not since she was a baby! We moved to AZ when she was 8 months old, and when we visit, we tend to be in a flurry of visits – to mom’s, Craig’s, Grace’s and other aunts and uncles in the area. Dad has always volunteered to travel to wherever we were and come see us up at the house, so we never stopped by his place! He’s smart and knows his place isn’t childproofed and is full of neat nick-nacks 3 & 5 year olds could destroy in a mili-second…

However, as most of you know, dad is not as mobile right now. He is fighting cancer with chemo and radiation, which I haven’t written much about, mostly to protect dear dad’s privacy. See, even my blabber-fingers have their boundaries! I am happy to report that he’s doing quite well and has the “incurable” cancer slowed down for now. Take THAT cancer! But the treatments leave him pretty weak and tired and not wanting to chase us around the city for now!

The best part about “Dad’s House” is it’s the house where I grew up! We moved there when I was just 3 years old (Aidan’s age!). Brigid was in seventh heaven when she found out she could plan in my old bedroom! It’s not quite the same as it was 20+ years ago, but my bed and desk are still there, as well as some trinkets that I never took with me when I moved out, yet didn’t want to throw away. Ah yes, the infamous holding pattern of clutter, yet perfect for a 5 year old to explore!

Right on my desk Brigid discovered my old friend and nemesis, RakuRaku Dinokun! I bought this virtual-pet game in 1997 when they were all the rage. I borrowed this picture from this website I love the fact that someone actually took the time to dedicate an entire webpage to her virtual pet! In fact, if you explore the website, she has many MANY pages dedicated to her entire collection of virtual pets. Nothing OCD about that.

I bought my little Dinukun while I was teaching English in Taiwan, so I feel greater affection towards is than if it were just some dumb old trendy techno gadget made in Taiwan… because I actually bought it there… I guess. Brigid, on the other hand, has treated the archaic, black-and-white, LCD-display low-functioning game like she has found the GREATEST! gadget on the planet EARTH! She loving showed it to Paul and exclaimed “This was Mommy’s toy when she was a little girl!” He glanced over at me sideways and murmured “You mean, like, when you were 24?”

It’s a shame those who are not in touch with their inner-child become so jealous of those of us who are…

Brigid loves her new/old little ‘baby” and takes excellent care of him… but there’s a slight problem. She goes to Kindergarten during the day, so somebody needs to baby sit it. That’s right! 10 years after unloading the stupid needy gadget that BEEP! BEEP!’s all day for food, water and attention that I have to click or it dies, I’m stuck keeping it alive all day at work! I seem to remember there was a huge controversy around these toys when they first came out because they were traumatizing to little children when their beloved pets “died”. Right. And there’s no irony in the fact I have my kids in daycare, but I spend my day attending to a virtual pet.

As if I don’t have enough crap to keep me busy all day…

A New Year

2008-01-28T22:34:00.000-08:00

I can’t believe I let the big day go by. It’s already Jan 28th.

As anyone knows me I’m totally infamous for forgetting birthdays. I forget my own as well, so I don’t discriminate. I was in charge of the “birthday lunch” parties at work this year, and I even messed that up by forgetting to get a card for a poor coworker until it was too late (I told her later to look under her desk because it must’ve fallen behind…)

It’s my annual New Year’s Resolution to improve on that. So without further adieu, I want to wish a big

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU - BLOG

A year ago Jan 26th I started my little page. This has been really fun for me this year to help re-connect with friends and family that I otherwise have nearly lost contact with. (thanks for the funny comment on my

International School entry BOB!) It’s allowed me a place to archive some stories, from the serious to the funny. It’s been a great place to post pictures, and has encouraged me to become more creative with my snapshots.

I’ve been lax updating for the past month, but I promise to be better about that.

I also want to dedicate today's entry to our friend Ann since this weekend it was her...

BIRTHDAY PARTY...

Where I've been

2008-01-22T19:39:00.000-08:00

Pretty pictures.

It would've been more enjoyable had it not been 22 BELOW ZERO while we were there.

Updates coming soon. I've been too cold to write.

Traditions

2008-01-01T21:17:00.000-08:00

Nothing highlights a year full of changes more than the approach of the most traditional days of the year. This year we found ourselves asking how do we find our traditions when so many pieces of our lives have been scattered and lost like feathers being blown away in a huge gust of wind?

Actually, this year has been more like the big turd hitting the fan blades, but the image isn’t quite as friendly.

Whether we liked it or not, Paul’s mom was a cornerstone in our family holidays. She lived alone and Paul was her only child, so to her it made obvious sense to her to spend as many holidays with us as she could – which pretty much meant all of them. Mother’s Day, Father’s Day, Groundhog’s Day… you name it! This didn’t stop or even slow down after we moved 2000 miles away. Last Christmas she spent a full two weeks in our home. If only we had the foresight to know that would be her last Christmas on earth, I may have tried to be more joyous (and patient), but overall I have very little regret with regards to her, since many daughter-in-laws would’ve simply kicked her out of their lives for any number of the stunts she pulled with us over the years.

As for Christmas, she ran the entire show from start to finish in the same way she tried to control every aspect in life (and those lives around her). I am a person who tends to give up the reins in order to keep harmony, so I mostly sat back all of these years and participated in her play. We ate the foods she deemed appropriate for Christmas dinner, attended the church service she found acceptable and decorated with the decorations she brought with her. Our holidays were scripted by her for years.

For more than 10 years this was what we had grown so accustomed to, we had never really built traditions of our own. We’ve had many people express we must be relieved to be freed from her visits, and in some ways I guess we are. But it also leaves a hole that she filled, and leaves us looking around our own family wondering how we begin our own family traditions?

It doesn’t help that we’re also 2000 miles from everyone and everything that we grew up with! There are no Christmas day blizzards to cause us travel woes, but there are also no grandmas’ houses to travel to. Cactuses, palm tress and sand replace forests of pine trees and snow, but there is no replacement for family and friends we miss so much back home.

Yet, our lonely quiet Christmas was joyous for us this year. We put up a real Christmas tree in mid-December. I wasn’t motivated to do much decorating myself, but Brigid is now 5 and ½ and extremely eager to make up for any of my lackluster enthusiasm! All I had to do was pull the boxes out of the garage, and she dug into them in no time, spreading her joy and cheer into every corner of the house!

We attended some fun activities at church like “The Sweetest Story Every Told” where the kids received a pile of cookies that they could decorate themselves. We attended two church services as a family, which to my amazement Aidan made it through! Paul and I looked at each other in horror when the pastor announced “we will now have a moment of silence…” Silence is a problem to be fixed in Aidan’s world, and this was no exception. Imagine a silent auditorium being suddenly broken with a 3 year old’s voice, which we all know is louder than 6 adult voices put together, “Why did evewything turn off? Daaaady? Why evewyone stop?! I see da Cwistmas Twee!! Moooommmmyyyy?!! I AM BEING QUIET!!!”

Thank heavens it was a family service, so we didn’t get the usual glares, but just snickers and smiles as we quieted him down.

All in all, Paul said he felt like it was one of the happiest Christmases he’s had in years. We are together and we feel like our lives are moving in the right direction. The future is unknown, but we have so much to be thankful for. The children are in wonderful health and have so much going for them. We still have my mom, dad and Craig with us – all of whom have faced or are facing grave illnesses and have so far triumphed (and all our prayers to keep on triumphing). Even if we’re not physically near one another, we have the love of our extended families, even as far away as Germany! Babies have been born this year to friends and family who have all been blessedly well (yay to Kim who recently had Brett!)

Most of all, the children are thankful for their overabundance of toys. Time to flood Goodwill and Free-cycle once again, because our shelves runneth over!

It's Beginning To Look A Lot Like Laziness...

2007-12-21T06:46:00.000-08:00

If you haven't received a Christmas card from us yet, fear not! You have not been erased from the great database of friends we maintain! I just haven't managed to get the cards out the door yet. (If you don't receive one by Jan 31, then maybe you aren't in the database after all, or more likely I don't have your current address!)

My excuse has something to do with two kids and a full-time job - and we Finance folks get a little busy at this YEAR END time of year. Thank goodness I don't do taxes anymore.

If you sent us a card - thank you! I've always loved Christmas cards. You can look on my bulletin board posted at the top and see if yours has arrived! It's not the fanciest display, but it works and it's easy. That's my mission statement for my entire life.

It looks like we have a lot of friends, but actually about half the cards are from places like our mortgage company, financial planners, life insurance, etc. etc. etc. You know, the places that are so happy we've placed our finances with them that they'll send us a card. And who said money doesn't buy friends?

Another Plesant Valley Sunday

2007-12-09T20:02:00.000-08:00

My children lead a, shall we say, soft life. No moon boots and snow mountains for them to traverse on their mile long walk to school. No wind whipping through their just-washed hair until icicles form on the braids. Still, Brigid feels a longing from deep within her soul for the icy, crunchy snow-covered sidewalks of her homeland. This is her in the backseat of my car on the way to Kindergarten Friday morning:

Photo Sharing - Video Sharing - Photo Printing - Photo Books

The funniest thing for us tough northerners-turned-Arizonans to witness this time of year is the native Arizonans reaction to the “winter” weather. The highs during the day dip all the way down into, like, the 50’s. At work this week, one of my cube-neighbors blew out electricity to her entire row because she, along with others in the row, was running her space heater too hot! People… it’s 60 AND sunny outside! I admit I will throw a sweater on in the morning when it is in the 40’s or 50’s, but even after living here for 4 years I still don’t even shake up the least shiver for this kind of weather. You can also spot the tourists from a mile away because they are the only ones driving convertibles with the tops down, or daring even to wear… shorts!

It is really is nice here this time of year. You get to laugh at me in July, but now it’s our turn to finally come out of our air-conditioned prisons since it’s no longer 120 degrees… in the shade! We can once again romp and play at the park without risk of our skin frying to the pavement or piece of metal playground equipment.

Last Sunday we got together with Ann & Keith at The Railroad Park for the afternoon. The Railroad Park in Scottsdale has been our favorite destination for the kids since before Aidan was even born. The park has free admission, and a 10-minute ride on the train around the park costs only $2/person. The park is more than just fun for kids, since the Arizona Model Train club meets there as well, and there are often large train displays that the kids can watch.
Oh yeah, Aidan doesn’t like that or anything.

It’s also very educational. It’s important to teach kids not to play on the tracks when a train is about to RUN THEM OVER… !!

Ok, the train wasn’t really going to "smooth over" the children, as Brigid would say. It’s really a museum train that President Woodrow Wilson used during his election campaign to give speeches and choo-choo around the country. Pretty cool and educational, huh?!

The good ol’ days.

I also used to love trains when I was a kid. Maybe it’s in the genes and Aidan picks it up from me… who knows. I used to ride my bike down to the tracks (the other side of them and all) and watch trains whisk by all day long. I learned that at night, if you whip a rock from the tracks at a freight car, it makes a spark. This probably falls on the list of things I’m glad my parents never knew about.

Well... I guess they know now...

Pictures and VIDEOS!! Yes VIDEOS!!

2007-11-30T20:15:00.000-08:00

I'm getting more technical by the minute folks!

Now that I have photoshop, I plan to become super-blogger-computer-girl now! I drive Paul totally crazy here in the office for hours on end clicky-clicking away with my photos. The best thing about taking photos and posting them is I don't have to write as much. I do love writing, but after a long day at work and feeding and bathing the children, my creative writing brain cells are ready for lights out. Sadly, there are so many things I could/should be writing about, but I just don't take the time to get all my thoughts on paper.

All in good time.

So... if a picture is worth a thousand words, what is a video? I have finally figured out how to get the videos off my cell phone, uploaded to my video website, and posted here! The easy part is the posting; the hard part is remembering all my user IDs and passwords to get from point A to point B to point Z to finally get the video over here!

This little video was taken in La Crosse, WI during our our trip in July It is at a park right outside the front door of my mom's house. La Crosse is in a beautiful valley along the upper Mississippi river. I don't think we'll be playing in the park when we travel this coming January, but maybe we can go sledding!

Photo Sharing - Video Sharing - Share Photos - Free Video Hosting

Ode to Keith and Ann!

2007-11-22T17:52:00.000-08:00

For procuring me my own copy of Photoshop, Keith and Ann, you have earned a special highlighted spot in my Thanksgiving blog today! What would one do without friends afterall? It's been a tough year, and I'm so glad we could be there for each other. Keith (a.k.a our special "Geek Squad" friend!), thank you for getting me my Photoshop program. My blog pictures will be blasted to a whole new level! It's like the program I always dreamed of, but never owned. I even Photoshopped my Christmas cards for this year, for those of you who are on our nice list... I wish I had hours and hours to play with pictures, but Photoshop makes even a few minutes of tinkering well worth the effort.

In case I didn't mention it...

THANKYOUTHANKYOUTHANKYOUTHANKYOUTHANKYOU!!!!!

Don't Forget The Snow!!

2007-11-20T20:51:00.000-08:00

Because nothing is quite as fun as flying around the country with a 3 and 5 year old, we’ve decided it’s time to make another fun-filled flight up to the great north! That’s right folks! The Family D will be comin’ to town… at least for those of you reading in WI or MN!

I started researching ticket prices from Phoenix to Minneapolis about a month ago for around Christmas. Well, no-can-do those prices. Think $500 x 4. And that’s before taxes and fees! Add a rental car onto that, plus meals and whatever else. Shoooot! You will not be seeing us for Christmas. However…

It turns out nobody in their right mind flies from Arizona to Minnesota in the middle of January! Heck, they’re practically giving those tickets away! In fact, when I went to click our seating assignments, the whole danged plane was empty! I’ve never gotten to pick seats right up front before. To get 4 seats near each other, we usually sit in the back with our heads getting banged by the lavatory door. January is definitely the right time for cheapos like us to be doing some traveling.

Well, you start getting cheap after you and your family have flown 2000 miles three times in the past year. Lets not forget a little European family trip as well. Holy moly, you never know on January 1st what a year is going to bring, do you…

Paul has actually earned himself ELITE status on our most frequent airline, due to the enormous amount of miles he’s flown this year. I’m close as well. That means when he checks in, if there is a first class seat available, they will offer it to him.

Wouldn’t it be nice of me to sit back in coach with the children, squished in our seats eating our dry crackers out of our snack box, while he enjoys a hot meal in his big luxury leather recliners sipping Champaign? …

BBBAAAA HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

Too bad I’m not nice. I’m really really not. And it’s not going to happen.

Sobering Facts - AZ DUI Laws

2007-11-15T10:08:00.000-08:00

Some facts to remember this holiday season.

Paul forwarded me the current AZ DUI laws, and boy was I shocked how strict they are! I am happy to say I've never been pulled over while under the influence, but I have gotten behind the wheel after a glass of wine or two (and more in my younger days). If the danger of drinking and driving isn't enough to stop and make you think twice, read the AZ laws below. If you're not from AZ, I suggest you find out what your state laws are, since I can't imagine they'd be much less strict. If anything, they may be more.

Standard DUI: BAC over 0.08 (three drinks for most men and two drinks for most women)
• Mandatory jail time of 10 days - No plea bargaining (second offense - 30 to 90 days)
• Mandatory suspension of driver's license for 90 days (second offense - one year)
• Mandatory installation of ignition interlock device in car for one year (Cost: $1,000 plus $100 per month)
• Court fees - $1,500 (second offense - $3,000), points, increased insurance, attorney fees, etc.

Extreme DUI: BAC over 0.15
• Mandatory jail time of 30 days - No plea bargaining (second offense - 60 to 120 days)
• Mandatory suspension of driver's license for 90 days (second offense - one year)
• Mandatory installation of ignition interlock device in car for one year (Cost: $1,000 plus $100 per month)
• Mandatory alcohol monitoring - 30 days (second offense - 90 days plus 30 days of community service)
• Mandatory vehicle impoundment - 30 days
• Court fees - $2,500 (second offense - $5,000), points, increased insurance, attorney fees, etc.

Super Extreme DUI: BAC over 0.20
• Mandatory jail time of 45 days - No plea bargaining (second offense - 180 days)
• Mandatory suspension of driver's license for 90 days (second offense - one year)
• Mandatory installation of ignition interlock device in car for 18 to 24 months (Cost: $1,000 plus $100 per month)
• Mandatory alcohol monitoring - 30 days (second offense - 90 days plus 30 days of community service)
• Mandatory vehicle impoundment - 30 days
• Probation - 0 to 1 year (second offense - 0 to 5 years)
• Court fees - $3,000 (second offense - $6,000), points, increased insurance, attorney fees, etc.

Felony DUI - 0.08 or above but with a MINOR in the car less than 16 years old
• Felony charge!
• Mandatory jail time of 30 days - No plea bargaining
• Suspended driver's license for three years
• Ignition interlock device - Installed in car for 18 months or possible loss of car ($1,000 plus $100 per month)
• Fees (up to $150,000), points, increased insurance, attorney fees, etc.
• Possible probation for up to 5 years

Note: If a person under 21 is pulled over and they have had ANY alcohol (even the day before they turn 21), they would be subject to the above rules plus will loose their drivers license for a minimum of two years with no plea bargain available and it will be on their record for 7 years.
Here is the even scarier part - it does not take that much to blow an 0.08!

Other facts:
• This BAC is not affected by whether a person can handle alcohol. It is a chemical formula based on your blood content, not how you act.
• A person can get a DUI with lower than 0.08 BAC if they fail the field sobriety test
• The BAC is at it highest 2 hours after the last drink is taken. The BAC will not start going down until 2 hours after the last drink (i.e . stalling at the police station will probably not help).
• The police officer said that they are starting to see a very high incidence of woman DUI after social lunches.
• The most common infraction people are pulled over for, especially at night, is the wide left or right turn
• When the police department has a DUI task force in place in an area, they will basically pull everyone over that is driving through the area ( i.e. regardless of whether a driver did something wrong). If they do not smell alcohol on your breath, they will give the driver a verbal warning. If they smell alcohol, they will say you were weaving.

Here is the advice from the DUI defense lawyer (besides don't drive even after you drink).
If you are ever pulled over and the officer asks you to get out of the car, there is a 90 to 95% chance you will be arrested unless you have had nothing to drink. The premise is he would not have asked you to get out of the car unless he suspected you were drinking or on drugs. The main purpose of the field sobriety test and the questioning (every question) is designed to gain evidence on you that you were "even slightly impaired".

As an example, you could fail the field sobriety test, go to the substation and blow a 0.06 and still get a DUI because they have proved that you were slightly impaired. The field sobriety test is very very difficult to pass even with no drinks. In addition it is a subjective test and no one knows, except the police officer, what really happened.

A Post Fly-By

2007-11-14T19:07:00.000-08:00

I’m just posting a quick mid-week hello here. I haven’t had a whole lot of time this week to post a whole entry, but there’s always fun things to write about! I wish I had more time – doesn’t everyone I guess?

Mon – Went to the gym. I’ve been trying to work out some evenings, so that has been cutting into my free time. I know… working out… like at the gym! Me! Who would’ve ever imagined?

Tues – Went to the grocery store. I didn’t make it this weekend because, I don’t know why, I just didn’t. So we were out of just about everything. When it’s an everything trip it takes awhile, so that sucked up my evening last night.

I’m also spending horrible torturous hours watching hideous finance videos. I’ve put off getting my 40 hours of required Continuing Profession Education (CPEs) in for the year for my CPA license, so the only way to stuff it in before year end is to watch awful videos and take the stupid online course to get credit. Fortunately it’s free since my company offers it. So far I’ve watched 10 boring-ass videos about exciting topics like taxation of corporate jets… oh man I don’t even remember what else because I slept through them. Out of the 10 videos, only 1 included a woman so far. Niiiiice. Every freaking finance video is a 40-60 year old balding fat guy droning on about amortization tables or taxation. My job is exciting compared to these bozos, and that’s saying a lot considering I spent the day putting together a 5 page spreadsheet analysis.
Time to throw the kids in the bath! Just not enough hours in the day…

Shear Luck

2007-11-10T20:14:00.000-08:00

Look at that long, silky straight hair - the COMPLETE opposite of my dark thick wavy hair - hanging in poor Aidan's face. The poor boy was long overdue for a haircut by this weekend. Before I became a parent I may have thought only a truly incompetent parent would let their kid's bangs grow right into his eyes like that. Little did I know what giving a haircut to a 3 year old boy might entail.

I tried to come up with the right image that would truly represent what it is like giving Aidan a haircut. I think this one comes close. Try giving HIM a haircut - the bull, not the cowboy.

Paul called me into the bathroom this evening to begin the ordeal. Paul is a man of many tallents and is quite good with the shears. Not that I'd let him cut my hair or anything, but he's always done a pretty nice job on Aidan, when we can pin him down.

Think I'm exaggerating? First we tried putting Aidan on Paul's lap while he held the shears in his one hand and Aidan's head with another. I pinned his arms down and the screaming began! Oh... not Aidans... mine! "Aidan HOLD STILL! QUIT LAUGHING! We're going to cut off your HAND if you don't put it down right now!" And you know that just got him laughing harder. Apparently the shears not only tickle Aidan's little scalp, but he thinks they are the funniest machine invented since the Halloween candy bowl with the hand that sticks out of it and grabs you as you try to reach for candy (have you seen them?) He won't hold still for one second when the shears come out! His head flails back and forth, up and down and his hands keep waving and grabbing the shears! He shrieks with laughter and yells "No! No! No cutting mine hairs!! No! Tickles!! HAHAHAHA!!!" We weren't getting anywhere!

As a last resort I ended up sitting on the floor and pinning his arms down and body between my knees while I held his head with my hands! It was still a difficult task as you can imagine he was kicking and pushing to try to get away! Paul quickly started buzzing, but Aidan kept wiggling and causing mistakes. The more mistakes one one side meant it had to go shorter on the other, back and forth and back and forth until by the end...

Well, there might not be much hair left there, but it is even and stylish! With a little flip in the front he's totally got the Arizona frat boy look ever I ever saw one. At least with it this short, it should be awhile before we have to try and cut it again.

Give Him A Hand...

2007-11-07T21:09:00.000-08:00

Most parents wonder if their children are normal. Are they meeting milestones? Are those strange quirks and habits they develop something more to worry about? Usually my conclusion is that I have healthy children. Weird, but healthy.

So today I was looking on the website Parent Center for a little mainstream advice. Since the time I was just barely pregnant, I’ve used this website for looking for general information, like how to get your kids to eat more vegetables, how to get them to sleep at night, or discipline alternatives to beating the daylights out of them. Yet, my kids never fit into the normal categories.

For instance, they have no articles on if you should worry that your child is drinking too much vegetable juice or still carries around a size 18mo jacket

By no means is Brigid the only quirky kid in this house. I was on Parent Center today looking up the topic of “preschooler obsessions” today because Aidan has developed an odd obsession about hands lately. I’m not talking about just his own hands, but all the hands in the entire world. .
Take for example, Paul took Aidan to the zoo a couple weeks ago, while I escorted Brigid to a birthday party. When he got home and I asked him what he saw, he excitedly said “I saw giraffes, cows and HANDS! I saw lots of HANDS!!!”

Whenever Paul leaves for work in the morning, Aidan absolutely has a meltdown if I don’t hold him in the garage so he can watch Paul pull the car out. Every single day, Paul opens his sunroof and has to stick his hands out the roof and wave goodbye so Aidan can see his HANDS! If he doesn’t, Aidan will melt into a sobbing heap on the floor.

He also likes to use the old “there’s a monster in my closet” excuse for not going to bed, except he’ll say wide eyed “there’s a hand in my closet,” or in his bed, or on the shelf, etc. A hand. I’ve never been sure how to respond to that one, other than the usual “no, there are no hands in your closet, Aidan.” That’s one of those weird sentences only a parent of a 3 year old would say, or the parent of teenager with very big issues! At this point I think I’m safe assuming there really aren’t any real hands stashed away in the closet.

So as usual, there is no standard advice for a parent who has a child with a hand obsession. At least it doesn’t appear to be a sign of some mental distress or disease. He’s just a very creative and intense 3 year old boy!

Growing Growing Growing!

2007-11-04T10:25:00.000-08:00

So far in this blog I have focused on the kids, Paul, and myself and my thoughts from time to time. I’ve even posted about the cat and the (former) fish. But today I’m going to take this blog to a whole new level of excitement… I’m going to write about the plants and trees in our yard! You can interpret this as meaning “no news is good news” since I’d much rather post about plants than a lot of other things that have gone on this year!

Back in March I posted this post about gardening and I promised to give an update later in the year. Unfortunately, Brigid’s little sprout didn’t make it very far. Growing things has been a huge learning experience for us here in Arizona – and I’m not just talking about the kids there… So I thought it was about time to take you on a tour of the other living things we care for here at home, only these things we can eat!

The children just aren’t ripe yet… bwaaa hahahaha…

First, a little history. We bought our home about 4 years ago from a family that adored planting fruit trees around the yard. You may have noticed from pictures I’ve posted in the past, our yard isn’t exactly very large to begin with. Growing in our little yard were 2 orange trees, 2 lemon trees, a peach tree, a grapefruit tree, a plumb tree and an apple tree! At first I was really excited, since I had never had fruit trees before, other than the occasional apple tree. But when spring hit, we realized quickly there was no way on earth we could consume that much fruit! Fruit trees that aren’t picked subsequently drop their fruit, and nobody loves dropped fruit more than the great big rats that invade people’s roofs. This was turning into a recipe for disaster! It was an astronomical task trying to keep the yard clean everyday, and there’s nothing more annoying than trying to clean prune juice off of pavement.

Of note as well, Arizona does not have a natural climate to support apple, plum and peach trees. This is a desert! Those are fruit trees that require a great deal of water and humidity. I could just see the environmentalists who support natural desert landscaping sneering if they took a peek at this year.

Although the people before us obviously loved planting these trees, they didn’t take the extra effort to properly care for them. They planted them all too close together, so they were choking each other out. I don’t like killing trees, but the deed had to be done. So Paul got his hack-saw out and removed the apple, peach and plumb trees and one of the 2 orange trees that wasn’t doing very well. Now we could focus ourselves on the citrus that we had remaining!

Back to our little yard tour now. I will start first with our struggling little garden. As you can see, Mr. Tomato plant is actually producing some red ripe tomatoes there! However, he doesn’t look so healthy. He is getting attacked by some mysterious mold that we’ve tried everything to get rid of. For now we’re just trying to get him to struggle along long enough to ripen the rest of the tomatoes that are there.

Next is our strawberry plot. This is not strawberry season, so they’re laying there rather flat and dormant until spring. I expect a good crop this year if we can keep the birds away!

And now to the fruit trees! Here is our one remaining orange tree! This tree is very popular! You can see the oranges are starting to ripen. They will be ready in about a month. They aren’t quite as big and juicy as the ones you get in the store, but they are extremely sweet and delicious. I think they’re actually more of a decorative variety, but they still taste good.

Next to the orange tree is lemon tree #1. The poor tree is so full of lemons that an entire section of the tree actually came crashing down this week! You can see the cracked branch in the picture. It’s a shame this happened before the lemons ripened. I’m leaving the branch for now since it’s connected enough to keep the lemon’s still alive, and Brigid is thrilled that she can actually reach them.

Over there are our other lemon tree and our grapefruit tree. The grapefruits are extremely huge! I’m not a grapefruit fan, but Paul likes them and usually eats them all.

A couple years ago we had an automatic watering system installed, so other than picking up fruit off the ground every weekend, there’s not much work involved. We do use a lot of water (ignore the pool sitting there… ahem…) but at least I can justify it in that we actually consume the fruit we’re producing. They’re not just for decoration. Occasionally we’ve even had a neighbor come by and meekly ask if they could have some lemons, and we’re always happy to share. If only we could share them with all our friends and family!

Halloween 2007

2007-11-01T21:54:00.000-07:00

Is Halloween over? Where did the time go? That's the most common question of my life. Who took my little babies away and replaced them with these big kids, who raced from house to house yesterday in their attempt to fill their buckets to the point where they could no longer carry them? We had another holiday full of fun memories and candy - what could be better? Gone are the days of pushing one or the other in a stroller from door to door. These two masters of the night can now TWICK o TWEET like experts!

It's funny sometimes when you're a parent. The little holidays feel so bittersweet. If only one could hold time in a bottle - or maybe a glittery Halloween pumpkin. The real pumpkins have slowly turned to a messy squash and the costumes put away - likely forever. Harvest time is over and now the big holidays are ramping up. I just enjoyed savoring the fun moments this year - the excitment over the SPOOKY! ghosts (that Aidan insists says MOOOO! - a cow ghost?) fake spider webs, costumes and excitment. I loved the fact that Brigid wanted to be a witch this year instead of a princess. I think she sees princess things as like so totally 4 year old, like, ya know? She wants to go out there and show the world her badness!

And little Aidan The Builder, with his tool belt and hard hat. He's going to be our little fixer. There's always something to fix around our place, and he's the man. Most likely he broke it anyway.

Nothing better than taking a break after a long night of candy mongering. Naptime is wherever and whenever it decides to hit. Peacful little angels for once.

ASU Homecoming and The 8-0 Victory!

2007-10-28T11:00:00.000-07:00

The first comment I made yesterday as Paul and I raced through the campus of Arizona State University just before the big homecomming game agains California was "Wow! I feel 10 years younger all of a sudden!" What a rush! Some friends of Paul's (and officially my friends too, but they were his friends first) invited us to the big game yesterday! I've been to a professional football game, but this was actually my first big college game. It was amazing!

The first hurdle was just getting to the huge, packed sold-out stadium in one piece. Our babysitter Yulia came at 4:00 and the game didn't start until 7:00, but trust me, you need that much time to get through the traffic. We slugged our way around the stadium until we found a storage facility about a mile away offering parking for $15. Not a bad price, but that left a long walk. The weather was good and it was fun to see parts of the campus I had never seen.

For the record, I am no alumni of this university. Paul's friend was, so we were going to meet her in an alumni tent. It took us awhile, but we found the tent and we found her. We were able to sneak a few drinks in and a plate loaded with fried up Mexican food before hitting the field. Perfect!

As I said before, the stadium was totally sold out! And of coure 90% of the crowd was ASU fans. Whenever they made a touchdown or even threw a completed pass the whole stadium erupted! It was really the most fun I've ever had at a game. It was impoosible not to get caught up in the enthusiam.

Paul and I did the old-fogie thing though and we left with 12 min left on the clock. We wanted to beat the crowd. I wouldn't usually worry so much about that, but when you're paying a babysitter by the hour, time becomes a bit more precious! It would've been fun for the kids to go to a game, but it would've been murder dragging them through those kinds of crowds and keeping them up so late. We will have to do a daytime game sometime.

It was so much fun just feeling like a college student again without a care in the world and forgetting for a moment all the huge responsibilities we have. It also makes me think of all the fun to come as the kids get older! One day they'll be in college and maybe we can tag along to games. Kid's love their parents doing that, don't they?

Welcome to Our Site

2007-10-27T10:28:00.000-07:00

Welcome everyone who is coming to visit our site for the first time! And when I say "our", I kind of mean "my" (Tina) because Paul doesn't read my writing very often. He just sits over on the side and worries about what kind of secrets about him I'm sharing with the whole world.

I hope you like this better than my old one. I have moved nearly all my Yahoo 360 posts to here (except for the stupid ones...) one by one. A painstaking task, but well worth it. I love this format! I will be keeping up my posts here from now on.

I will also be feeding these posts over to my Multiply site, for those of you who are connected there. Just let me know if you need my user name and we can connect up. This way I don't lose all the connections and friends i made on 360! It really seems like the best of both worlds.

Also, now ANYONE can leave comments on my posts, so comment away ya'll! If you don't have a Google account, you can just leave an anonomous posting, but stick your name on the post so I know who you are. I might delete you otherwise. I don't need any creepy freaks posting comments, and I know none of my friends or family are creepy freaks... are you?

Have A Drink On Me

2007-10-21T10:12:00.000-07:00

So after church today... yes church!... we decide to take the kids out to eat. Of course, it's only 10:30am, so the Chinese place Paul wanted to go to was pretty empty. He was hungry because he had been up since 5am, like crazy morning people tend to do. Morning people are a breed of their own, but I digress. So we're at this Chinese restuarant after church and aren't we just the cutest dang family you ever saw. I'm in my blue cotton dress and Brigid is dressed in her sweet red apple-dress that she reserves for Sunday only. Aidan was lookin' all grown up in his sweater vest and 'spenders (he has no butt so pants don't stay on him).

Darn, we're the most wholesome family you ever did see.

We're eating our sweet-and-sour chicken and tofu broccoli garlic things when a woman holding a baby comes walking near our table. We were sitting near the soda machine, so she was refilling her drink. She smiled over at us and Brigid looked at me excitedly and said "Hey mom! She's filling up her cup with beer just like you always do!"

Note to self: Never EVER joke with the children again and call root-beer just "beer". Because for the rest of your existance you will forever be known as the mom whose favorite drink is beer.

Coming Out Of The Haze

2007-10-18T10:09:00.000-07:00

On Tuesday when I found out I had strep, I still felt relatively OK. I was getting out of the house a bit, although I felt pretty tired and slow. I skipped my night at the gym and was taking it easy, but I thought I'd be back at work the next day.

Then came Wednesday and the Flu.

Yep. I couldn't just get strep. Folks - if this is the flu bug going around for this year, take precautions now! I get my annual flu shot, but I hadn't even had a chance to get it yet! They just came out with it a week ago or so. I may still go get one, since there are more than one strain, and I don't want to get hit again.

Today I'm feeling better, but still extremely run down. I was able to get myself showered and dressed, which was a big step up from yesterday. I took the kids into school and tried not to touch anything. Usually it's the kids getting me sick, but this time I'm the first one to come down with this. Which of course means we're likely in for a month or more of virus-spread in this house.

Or maybe not. Maybe I'm the only one with this crappy immune system that can't seem to fight off a single bacteria that comes within a mile of me. I eat more than 5 serving of fruits and veggies every day. I take vitamins. I even exercise, which is complete torture for me. Have you tried acai juice yet? It's the new "super-food" that's supposed to be 10x's more powerful than pomegranate for fighting disease. I drink that too. Yet if there's a single flu bug in a room of 1000 people, I'm the one who is going to get sick.

Any more suggestions?

Germy Again

2007-10-16T22:08:00.000-07:00

Obviously eating healthy does nothing for you health. I’ve been getting in more than my 5 recommended fruits and vegetables for months now, as well as taking a whole slew of vitamins.

And why? So I can remain healthy.

But I woke up this morning all achy and unable to speak once again. It’s stupid freaking strep all over again. Have my tonsils gone bad or something? The kids aren’t sick. I feel like someone is stepping on the back of my head, and it’s not someone little like Aidan, because he steps on my head all the time.

See you later. I’m going to Chipotle for lunch now.

A Picture Is Worth A Thousand Words

2007-10-14T22:06:00.000-07:00

I'll just let you look at them instead of having me write anything!

I've finally sat down long enough to upload aaaallll our pictures from Germany.

Here is the link to to view the slideshow

For those of you who want to see the whole thing, just hit the play button at the top and let it roll. It's over 100 pictures, but it's plays pretty fast. You can also just pick some thumbnails as well if you just want to see a few. As you can imagine, 80% of them are pictures of the kids.

Cows and Pumpkins

2007-10-07T22:03:00.001-07:00

I fancied up my page today with a cool Halloween theme. Cows and pumpkins – just like home! I always get excited about autumn. The things I love about October most, other than candy and beer fests, are pumpkins and harvest time. I love the abundance of squashes, the crunching of leaves, the hayrides…

Oh wait, I live in Arizona.

It’s like spring here, not fall. My tomato plant that Brigid started got fried in the summer heat, but Paul stuck a new one in the ground and for the first time, we have tomatoes growing! We tried pumpkins last year, but some kind of weird white mold overtook them and snuffed them out. We may at least have a January harvest of tomatoes if all goes well.

There are some farms out of town that put on pumpkin and fall festivals, but they are dreadfully crowded and overpriced. A couple years ago we attended one where the pumpkins were selling for $12 apiece for small ones! And that’s after they charged over $10/person to get in the gate. No thanks.

I wanted to go to Minnesota this weekend, but Paul had a good time without me. He’s on the plane home right now and should be here in an hour. That means I need to start cleaning up so I can make it look like I did something this weekend other than sit the kids in front of the TV and watch movies and eat popcorn all day. And candy corn.

And a big thanks goes out to Ann & Keith who came all the way up here from the outskirts of Mesa to keep me company yesterday. We even went to the mall, which was a good way to wear the kids out and it kept me from going out of my mind. Mostly.

Over The Hill

2007-09-25T21:58:00.000-07:00

Paul turns the big 4-0 tomorrow! Yes, he will be officially OLD OLD OLD!! I'm so glad he doesn't read my blog. Don't forget to send him harassing Over the Hill notes if you have his email address (ask me for it if you need it - I will provide!)

I remember being at his 30th birthday party. All I can say is wow... so much can happen in one decade. I was just a little college student working as his servant... I mean employee.

Yea. I shacked up with the boss.

Those were the days when he lived in a little apartment on top of a strip mall. In fact, it was on top of the Dominos Pizza where my brother Craig was working as a delivery guy at the time. Hey Craig, remember when we used to call up and make you actually deliver the pizza to us upstairs because we were too lazy to walk down and just get it ourselves?!

Oh man, we've matured so much since then!

Er - you know that fish I mentioned in my last post? Dead. He was with us for 2 years, and I make one little post about him and go out and find him all upside down! And I never even took a picture of him to share. The guilt is crushing me! We hope we provided him with a happy fishy life. At least he waited until we got back from Germany before doing his belly-up.

We put him in our lizzard cemetery out in the back yard. Paul put an obnoxious grave marker out there for all the creatures that Brigid insists on holding funerals for. Paul played the Navy Hymn for him on his bagpipes.

OK - I'm kidding about the bagpipe thing. But wouldn't that be fitting? And I know those of you who know us and read that totally believed he did that, because he would so do that, and if he reads this he'll probably go out there and do it just to prove some wierd point.

Also, because I know you've been dying to know, Aidan has had 2 days in a row of not biting anyone... in the ass. I told my Grandma Vernie about that and I thought she was going to have a stroke she laughed so hard. I'm glad our pain is providing entertainment. She was a teacher, so she understands.

Otherwise things around here are normal. You know, for us.

Guten Saturday!

2007-09-15T21:56:00.000-07:00

It's Saturday morning! There's nothing better than having two whole days of not working to look forward to. Well, if "not working" includes doing all the laundry, cleaning the house and entertaining a 3 and 5 year old. It's still not sitting in my cube watching Excel television all day.

Two whole days away from school. Except for Brigid.

Paul just left with Brigid a few minutes ago to take her to her German class. She had 3 weeks of all day intensive learning at a German summer camp in June. We spent 2 weeks in Germany where the only English we heard was coming out of my mouth. Now she's spending her Saturday morning continuing the learning experience. She really enjoys it, and the class is more about playing games and making crafts than sitting and learning. She has progressed beyond knowing one word in German (Ice = ice cream) to probably 20 or more words, especially if you count her numbers. We were in a very rural area of the country, so she knows most of her barn animals in German. Not sure if she'll need that here in Phoenix, but hey, learning is learning.

After I finish writing this, I'll spend some quality one-on-one time with the boy. He did really well at school this week and managed to get through the whole week without biting anyone. If only I could say the same! (kidding...) We're going to take a trip to the library and return the higepileofbooks I have covering my bedroom. I also have to pay my usual overdue fine. I just call it my own special way of supporting our public library system. You're welcome.

I have been getting many inpatient requests to see the 100+ pictures from Germany. I'm getting there! I am a busy mom you know. I'll also work on that this weekend and get them all uploaded and ready to share

9/11

2007-09-11T21:55:00.000-07:00

I wasn’t going to post about my memories from 9/11, since I feel terribly unworthy to do so, especially after reading blogs from people who had real connections to the terrible scenes. I, like most Americans, was sitting safely away just watching the television in disbelief. However, I did want to share something personal from that day none of us will/can ever forget.

Below is an instant-message transcript I saved from the very moment I found out about the attacks, and I thought it may be interesting to share. I was chatting online with my good friend Danny, who at the time worked in Arlington. The conversation took place over a few hours, although you can’t tell that just by reading it through. Re-reading our conversation brings chills to me, as I remember the feeling of truly not knowing what was happening. There was so much dis-information and the country was in a state of panic, and even buildings where I worked in safe Minnesota were being evacuated. My fear was nothing compared to those who had to live through the terror for real.

danny: Wow...not to digress, but I just heard that each of the twin towers of the World Trade Center in NYC got hit by airplanes! At least one of them seems to have been a hijacked plane!

Tina: WHAT?!

Tina: oh my GOD!

danny: WTC: That was my reaction...

Tina: reading news now

danny: I think that's the first time something like that has happened since WWII, when a disabled bomber crashed into the Empire State Building.

Tina: news website loading VERY slowly... i think a lot of people are looking at it

danny: That's what Emily said--sites on the story were very, very slow...

Tina: i can't get any of them up at all

danny: BRB

Tina: were people in the WTC killed?

danny: OK, I'm back. This is bad...

danny: Laurie just called me too, worried about, and I had to assure her I was still a good 20 miles from the city...

danny: One of the planes was a 767. Still don't know about the other plane. And as I was up I just found out another plane was crashed into the Pentagon. The White House has been evacuated just in case.

danny: 737 into the Pentagon.

Tina: OH MY GOD OH MY GOD

Tina: watching news here

danny: Be back

Tina: are you being evacuated???

danny: No--we still are over 20 miles away. But *every* federal building is being evacuated and ALL air traffic across the country has been grounded.

danny: My friend James can see the smoke rising over the Pentagon from his apartment. Jesus, I'm glad I'm not working in Arlington today--I had to go right by the Pentagon to get to work.

danny: The USA Today building, which is alongside the highway right before you get to where I was, is covered in smoke.

danny: They also just reported that one of the Twin Towers has collapsed, making the authorities think that maybe there had been bombs planted inside, too.

danny: I'll be back in a bit.

danny: OK, a section of one of the towers has come down, not the whole thing...

Tina: this is horrible

Tina: I'm so glad you're safe where you are

Tina: I'm scared

danny: There have been reports of more explosions at the Pentagon--it seems like another plane came down, but may have *missed*!

danny: I think you're about in one of the safest cities you can be in as far as this sort of thing is concerned.

Tina: oh my god... what is next

Tina: Yea... i'm not scared for myself

Tina: how many thousands were kileed?

danny: No way to tell yet...hmmm, looks like our Arlington office has been evacuated (you could see the Pentagon smoke there too), and the Pentagon City metro stop (which I passed on the way there every day) has been shut down. All federal offices, not just buildings, are being closed down.

danny: Goodness...even AOL decided to shut down for the day. That's just down the road from here.

danny: About a five minute drive in normal traffic.

Tina: i can't believe this

Tina: have you seen the pictures?

danny: Not yet. Everything with pictures are clogged.

danny: Car bomb went off in front of the State Department...just saw footage of the second plane going through the Towers...and CNN is reporting that the top halves of both Twin Towers are gone...

danny: Scrap that...both of the Towers are gone.

danny: Our folks at the Arlington department are stuck there because traffic getting out is so bad. Interstate 66 are turning into a parking lot.

danny: -states 66 and 95, that is.

danny: Another plane just went down in Pittsburgh. Apparently this was the third plane that authorities speculated was supposed to go after the Twin Towers, and got diverted. Looks like it may have been heading for D.C.

Tina: you still there?

Tina: i can't even imagine this. I can't even believe this

danny: Still here. Still listening to the radio and sifting through reports. The folks over in our Arlington office can't leave now because the traffic is so heavy and the Pentagon City metro station has been closed.

danny: Phones are fried. Only e-mail, Telnet, and messaging are working.

Tina: oh my god

Tina: they say two planes went down in Pittsburg

Tina: maybe the attack is finished now

danny: I hope so.

Tina: a woman who works here, her son works in the Pentagon. She's crying...

danny: Two planes down in Pittsburgh, but it doesn't seem they hit anything. If there was another aircraft that hit the Pentagon, it apparently hit the Heliport instead of the building. Part of one side of the Pentagon may have collapsed, but no one except military can get close enough to confirm that.

danny: Another plane just exploded over Somerset Co., MD...must have been carrying bombs.

danny: (That's NE of here)

danny: I think

Tina: good god

Tina: i'm surprised yahoo is still up

Tina: i just heard one crashed at camp david

danny: ?

danny: Where did you hear that?

Tina: radio

Tina: now they're not talking about it...

danny: Reagan National Airport (also near the Pentagon--I passed it when I'd head out from Arlington to meet Loralie) is now being evacuated.

danny: How're you holding up, Tina?

danny: The Washington Post's website is back online.

Tina: huh... I don't even know what to say

Tina: 50,000 people work in the WTC

Tina: sounds like they're actually hiding the president now

The Beer Was Great!

2007-09-09T21:53:00.000-07:00

Hello friends and family – we are back from Germany! It turns out that traveling to Europe with a 3 and 5 year old is an exhausting experience. Who knew? Aw, but we had fun! Travel to children at this age is not a stressful experience… for them! They get to just ride along and enjoy the sights and sounds while Paul and I frantically figure out where we’re going – like how to get through customs, when our next plane connects, and how to buy train tickets with Euros in those confounded ATM ticket machine things in Amsterdam!

The trip has a rocky start to say the least. We had some delays on the way to the airport and ended up nearly missing our first flight! The ticket people let us cut in line at check in fortunately, although people around us grumbled (get over it people). From there it was pretty smooth for 12 hours of flying time total. Our 8 hour flight was on a plane with TV’s in each seat with many movie selections, so the kids were pretty happy and entertained. Things seemed well… until we went to pick up our luggage in Amsterdam. “Paul, what suitcase did you pack your clothes in?” I asked after we loaded all our luggage on a cart. “I don’t know… the green one I think…” No, he didn’t. He packed all his clothes in the red one which was sitting on our bedroom floor at home. ARG!! Too late to do anything about that, so we went to buy train tickets and the machine would not accept our credit cards! We had Euros, but the stupid thing wouldn’t accept cash. This is when I began to panic a bit! We made our way through the airport and found a place where you could buy train tickets without a machine (WHEW!) but when Paul finished, we found out we had FIVE minutes to board our train, and we didn’t even know where the stupid boarding area was. We obviously missed it, so we ended up catching another train that required us to make 3 trains changes along our route. At least it got us to Leer, Germany where Paul’s family could pick us up.

The rest of the trip went very well in comparison to this. This was my first trip to Europe and I loved it! Of course, it wasn’t an exciting whirlwind trip of cities and countries like we would’ve done before children. We took it very easy and stuck pretty close to “home”. We had a fabulous set up for “home” by the way! We stayed at Grace’s cousin Silvie’s duplex apartment so we had a kitchen, 2 bathrooms, multiple bedrooms and a living room! Her daughter and family live in the house next door, so the backyard also included a swingset, sandbox and lots of toys. These are things that get you excited when you are a parent of little ones, as opposed to museums and nightlife!

I am in the process of downloading our 100+ photos and I will link them in here when I’m done. Unfortunately, Yahoo 360 is very weak when it comes to sharing photos, so I’ll do my best.

I tell you though, the best part of the whole trip for me was the food! (is anyone surprised there?) I was never such a huge fan of sausages until I went to Germany! Their bread is what bread was meant to be; it was always smothered in butter and fresh cheeses I’ve never known before, even coming from Wisconsin! And every day included some family member inviting us over for tea and some amazing cake made from scratch! I gained 5 glorious pounds that I don’t regret one bit!

So now the process of getting back to life as usual! I’m trying not to fall asleep at 1pm and wake up at 2am. The kids have not been successful at this and Brigid was up watching cartoons in the middle of the night last night! She can take a nap at Kindergarten on Monday at least. I will not be so lucky at work!

Disaster Area

2007-08-24T21:52:00.000-07:00

The headline in the Minnesota newspaper that I read online today: “Bush declares disaster areas in three Minnesota counties: Houston, Fillmore and Winona.” Houston county – that would be where Grace’s… I mean our house is (still can’t get used to that). After 10-16 inches of rain fell over 24 hours early this week, hundreds of homes and 6 lives in the area were wiped out in an instant.

I called dad and asked him if he would mind taking a trip over to the house and seeing if it was still there. We were scared to death because, although the house is on a hill, water can easily come rolling down the hill right into the 1st floor! Also, there are countless stories of peoples’ hillside homes being totally obliterated by mudslides.

We were very very blessed and fortunate. No damage what so ever.

Yesterday on the way home from work I caught an interview on NPR of a couple from the same county. Their house, along with several others, was washed away in a few moments along with all their belongings in the world. Like many of the homeowners there who had plenty of insurance for tornados, fire and even earthquakes, the insurance companies will not cover flood damage. They were truly left with nothing in the world but the clothes on their backs and an unpaid mortgage. Sometimes I don’t feel as sorry for people who obviously live in areas of the country that are prone to disasters and build their house there anyway, but this was something nobody ever foresaw.

It’s more sad reminders that you can’t base your life on your things you own. You can’t work your life for your fortunes, because fortunes can be whisked away in an instant. Insurance can help you feel protected, but there’s no protection against many unforeseen disasters.

I don’t mean to sound depressing or grim about it. It’s just a fact to keep in mind to actually life your life better! Live for your passions and for those you love. Live for God and what you believe in.

It’s easy for me to say. Our home is still standing, undamaged. Thank God for that. Fortunately, Grace quite literally “built her house upon a rock!” Also, her home was in a very narrow area that did not receive as much rain as some surrounding areas in the county. Just pure dumb luck.

It’s been a strange week seeing so many pictures on the national news right there from our little home town. If any of my friends from the area are still having water woes, my thoughts and prayers are with you!

August Hair Update

2007-08-21T21:51:00.000-07:00

New hair color today. My hair changes like a Minnesota weather system. You have no idea what you're gonna get the next day.

Hope all my friends up there in the HUGE flood zone are doing alright! Mom had her basement flooded after getting something like 500 inches of rain in a minute. Or maybe it was closer to 10 inches in an hour. Either way it was freaking insain! Glad I'm in the desert.

It's 9:00 and I don't even have the kids in their pajams yet. But I had to show you my new haircut. I have priorities people!

Treasure Unveiled!

2007-08-19T21:47:00.000-07:00

On Aug 4 I wrote this entry about finding an old camera with film still in it. This weekend Paul took it over to Walgreens (I know, not CVS. It’s closer to us alas…) to get the film developed. I had hoped at least there would be some pictures of the kids when they were really little that we had been missing, but to my great surprise, they went much further back than that!

The film was from 2001, or the Time-Before-Kids as I call it! There are pictures from a trip we made to the Minneapolis Renaissance Festival which were kind of fun. Better than that, there were pictures from Christmas at our house in Rochester. Dad, Craig & Stacey, Grandma Vernie, and Stuart, Andrea and Whitney were all there! It was fun seeing old pictures and thinking “oh, I remember that!” over and over.

However, the winning picture is the one I posted above. Paul and I drove across Minnesota and North Dakota in November of that year and crossed the Canadian border to reach Rivers, Manitoba (near Winnipeg) Eh? We went to visit his old and dear friend Don Mitchell. Don was Paul’s first bagpipe teacher. Don never had children of his own, and he sort of “adopted” Paul as his son. Paul spent several summer in Manitoba with Don and playing bagpipes at a summer camp held there. Apparently it’s the premier place for kid’s to learn how to play bagpipes in North America, in case you were looking for one.

We knew Don was getting along in age and likely didn’t have much time left. It was an emotional visit for Paul, knowing it would likely be the last time he would see Don. Indeed it was, as Don passed away the next year. Paul was able to play his pipes for Don one last time before we left. The picture shows them playing a tune together on their practice chanters. It was a truly happy moment captured in time and a real gem for us to find.

Because I Said So

2007-08-17T21:45:00.000-07:00

Watching children play is when you can see beyond the simple words they tell you, and see what they’re thinking. Tonight Brigid was lining up a few of her Barbies for their bath (with her). She has a nightly routine where she dresses them in pajamas and puts them to bed, one at a time on their own make-shift washcloth pillows and covers them with they’re hand-towel blankets. She lovingly mothers them and kisses them, which seems odd since they’re actually grown-ups and not baby-dolls. Tonight as she was putting one of her Barbies in the bathtub, she began to scold her and said sharply “You need to take a bath because I said so. I’m bigger than you and you’re smaller than me, so that’s why you need to listen.”

Is that what she thinks of the parent child relationship? I’m bigger and she’s smaller, so that’s just the way it is? I’m glad she finds reason she has to listen, but I really was hoping years of gentile and loving discipline would have her look at us as guides in life instead of just big bullies.

I’m not always as gentile and guiding as I’d ideally like to be. Tonight Brigid and I got into a huge monstrous battle over carrying her backpack. If you asked Paul what he and I last argued about, it would probably be something petty and stupid too, like the proper way to stack the Tupperware or how loud the TV should be. It’s ridiculous how people who love each other so much can get so angry and hostile over what otherwise is not a big deal.

The battle of the backpack started when I picked her up at school. She didn’t want to hold it, and my arms were full so I couldn't take it, so she started dragging it on the ground. I snapped at her to pick it up, and she started smarting back to me. She looked at me defiantly as she continued to drag it down the hallway. I warned her that she was getting it dirty and ruining it, but she defiantly stamped her foot and shook her head. By the time we got to the car, I opened up the trunk and threw it in there and slammed the door closed and told her “The backpack is gone now! You’ll never have to carry it again! It's gone!”

She looked at me wide eyed and began to cry. I knew she believed I really was taking her backpack away forever, and I let her believe that because I was so mad at the way she was acting. She sobbed all the way home.

I gave it back to her when we got home and she had calmed down. She snuggled with it on the couch for a while as she composed herself. I really feel bad that I became so unglued over a backpack. But, on the other hand, she was acting up and testing the waters with me by sassing back and dragging it on the ground.

So who’s the winner? She most likely won’t try that again, so I’ve fixed the behavior. But I also reinforced that I’m big and she’s small, so she’s just got to listen and that’s that. It doesn’t feel loving and guiding. I want her to want to behave, not feel she has to behave.

Such is life and being a parent. It sucks to be little. I have a feeling things aren't going to get easier as they get older...

First Day Of The Rest Of Her Life

2007-08-15T21:40:00.000-07:00

There’s few days from early childhood that most of us can say we all remember. The first day of Kindergarten is usually one of them – what could be more exciting for a small child? How about having it be your birthday as well! Brigid had the great fortune of turning 5 on Monday, just in time to bring a tray full of chocolate and white sprinkle cupcakes celebrating her big day. What a way to make friends from the start.

I’ve never been above buying friendship.

Off my little girl is going into the big wide world. We did decide on private kindergarten this year, due to her young age. It’s a small class that offers lots of individualized attention. I know all parents have a hard time letting go, but I just can’t send my widdle pumpkin out into public school quite yet! I know I’ll feel more comfortable next year when she’s a bit more self-confident.

It’s been an amazing transformation this week. Brigid seems to think she suddenly crossed the threshold into certified adulthood. On Monday morning I casually said “Brigid – you’re a five year old now!” She looked at me with wide eyes. She knew her birthday was coming up, but she didn’t quite make the connection that that meant she was turning the big five… um five. Her first question was “does this mean I can have a baby now?!”

Obviously I need to watch her very closely with that six year old neighbor boy.

She’s also slowly giving up her lovey dee-dah after all of these years (see highlighted post to the side “Stuck On You”) I can hear the collective *gasp* from anyone who has spent time around Brigid in the past, oh, 4 years that she’s dragged it around! She only now holds it when she’s sleeping so she can “suck her thumb and smell it.” Here’s another dee-dah moment from last year when we were visiting Uncle Craig and Aunt Stacy:

Tomorrow's A Gift

2007-08-14T22:00:00.000-07:00

Sometimes when words fail, that perfect song is out there that says it all. I posted the lyrics below if you don't have speakers.

Dad - we love you. Stay strong and we can all get through this together.

(song written by Tim McGraw after his dad - a famous baseball player - found out bad news from a medical exam)

________________________________________________

He said I was in my early forties

with a lot of life before me

when a moment came that stopped me on a dime

and I spent most of the next days

looking at the x-rays

Talking bout the options

and talking bout sweet time

I asked him when it sank in

that this might really be the real end

how’s it hit you when you get that kinda news

man what’d you do

and he said

I went sky diving

I went Rocky Mountain climbing

I went 2.7 seconds on a bull named fumanchu

and I loved deeper and I spoke sweeter

and I gave forgiveness I’d been denying

and he said someday I hope you get the chance

to live like you were dying.

He said I was finally the husband

that most the time I wasn’t

and I became a friend a friend would like to have

and all the sudden going fishin

wasn�t such an imposition

and I went three times that year I lost my dad

well I finally read the good book

and I took a good long hard look

at what I’d do if I could do it all again

and then

I went sky diving

I went Rocky Mountain climbing

I went 2.7 seconds on a bull named fumanchu

and I loved deeper and I spoke sweeter

and I gave forgiveness I’d been denying

and he said someday I hope you get the chance

to live like you were dying.

Like tomorrow was a gift and you got eternity to think about

what�d you do with it what did you do with it

what did I do with it

what would I do with it?

Sky diving

I went Rocky Mountain climbing

I went 2.7 seconds on a bull named fumanchu

and then I loved deeper and I spoke sweeter

and I watched an eagle as it was flying

and he said someday I hope you get the chance

to live like you were dying.

To live like you were dying

To live like you were dying

To live like you were dying

To live like you were dying

A Musical Note

2007-08-07T22:23:00.000-07:00

I'm staying up late tonight, like past 10:00!, because I'm playing around with some more photos. I still haven't developed my mysterious roll of film, but I have been looking through some photos from several years ago. I'm being forced to do this since Yahoo Photos is shutting down, so I have to move them somewhere else. I already have a Kodak Gallery account, but it does not have any blog-posting feature (get with the program Kodak!), so I opened up a Flickr account to store them in the meantime.

Posted above is an old Photo from The Time-Before-Children. This photo was taken during an afternoon boat ride on the Mississippi with a group of musicians. That thing I'm holding? That's an Irish drum called the Bodhran. Paul and I played in an Irish music band a long time ago. If someone can point me in the right direction where I could upload it to the web, I even have some nifty soundbites from an interview we did on a local radio program! In fact, Paul (and even myself a bit) was featured on an Irish Folk Music CD put out by Ben Mallory. I don't advertise that much because I actually sing in one of the tracks (Johnny Come Marching Home Again), and no matter how the recording studio filtered it out, I still cringe whenever I hear my own recorded voice.

True Story: I was in my 5th grade choir at school. We were putting on a Christmas play one year and we were all trying out for the various singing roles. After we were finished with the auditions, my music teacher approached me and asked me if I wanted the extra special role made just for me - narrator! At the time it felt like an honor, but years later when I thought back to it... hey, wait a second...

Yeah, that's how I sing. I wasn't even allowed in my 5th grade musical!

However, I did take piano lessons for many years and played the flute in high school band. It's a shame how many children take music lessons while growing up, but once out of school just leave it all behind. Being with Paul and playing folk music has been a great outlet for the many years of lessons I took. To any of my parents reading this - aren't you glad I put those music lessons you paid years and years for to good use? I thought so.

I still have my bodhran and one day plan to get back to my old drumming days. I also still have my Scottish Snare Drum, although I have yet to march in any parades. I did once play it for a live audience (at a nursing home Christmas show...). Paul and I played the coffee shop circut back in Minnesota, and even played at Rochesterfest over lunch. Big time? Ok, I may not be ready to hit the road with Celtic Women yet, but we plan to have many more years of fun with it all.

And just remember, you all knew me when I was just an unknown!

Possible Treasure?

2007-08-04T22:22:00.000-07:00

I love photos. I have always loved photos. When I was little, I would spend hours paging through old photo albums at my grandparents house and I'd never get bored of it. I'm not interested enough to be a photographer (nor all that creative) but I mostly love just paging though photo albums.

I do like to scrapbook, when I have the time. But I'm not so patient alas.

The photos you see in this blog - about 90% were taken by me. Paul is not at all into taking photos, so it is usually left up to me. Or maybe I am just more likely to pry the camera out of his hands screaming "MINE minemineminemine!!!"

He took the one above. He's artistic and creative. I must force him to click more often, because when he does, he captures some great things.

I've been on a mission the past few weeks to de-clutter our master bedroom (Flylady thing, for those of you who play...) The bedroom is the second most likely stash-and-dash room in the house, after the guest bedroom. Any room that is in the back and you can close the door is just asking for clutter. I was digging out the dresser and bookshelf (piled sadly high with my books) when I ran into an old camera of mine!

In 2002 I converted over to digital cameras, but this is my real 35mm Olympus that I had for years! This camera went with me to college, to Tiawan and every place in between. But the cool part... it has film left in it with 15 pictures taken! What could they be?

So now I have to finish off the roll of film today and find out what I took! When I get it develped, I'll have it put on CD to I can share! It could be pictures from one of the kid's birth, or it could be boring stuff around the house. I have no idea!

Wait here and you too will find out with me!

Just Stuff

2007-08-03T22:20:00.000-07:00

Not too much going on this week. No news is good news! I have no profound words of wisdom tonight and I'm not feeling silly or funny about anything. I'm just happy being here. Happy with life, happy with my family. I'm looking forward to a nice weekend, although we don't have anything specific or special planned.

Aren't I just an explosion of excitement?!

I'm almost finished with Harry Potter. (no spoilers here, no worry) Honestly, that's sucking up some of my little spare time. I was up reading from 10-midnight last night, and am nearly complete. One more night and I'll be done. I wish I would've just had 6 straight hours to dedicate towards it, but a few hours here and there has helped me absorb the story more slowly, which has been well worth it. The fun part is that I had actually predicted many of the storylines in the book, but some things I really didn't see coming. I like a series that has a logical and wrapped up ending.

The book deals a lot with death and life after death, which has been somewhat a theme for me this year, so the story fit right in with my life and my interests.

I didn't want to go too long without posting, or else my good friends might worry about me :) But like I said, no news here. I have some fun blog posts in mind for the weekend, so I hope to find some time to catch up.

Monsoon!

2007-07-31T22:19:00.000-07:00

It doesn't rain in the desert very often, but when it does...
Watch Out!
At least we have Aidan to mop it up for us. He may need a bigger mop.
We've lived here 4 years and I have yet to have seen a rain like we had tonight! As you can see from the picture, our backyard actually flooded right upto the house! There's still at least 2 inches of rain just outside my back step.

A Sad Day In Phoenix

2007-07-27T22:18:00.000-07:00

A very sad tragedy for the city of Phoenix today. Two news helicopters collided over a downtown park and 4 reporters died. Just seeing a picture like that makes my stomach turn over. I’m glad I wasn’t near the site to witness it, as I’m sure many people did. The news is full of weeping reporters trying to cover the story and remained composed.

http://www.cnn.com/2007/US/07/27/helicopter.crash/index.html

I just found out about this a few minutes ago, and I do have to get a few thoughts out.

Wasn’t this bound to happen? How many helicopters do we really need buzzing around every time a criminal runs from police or holes up in a house? Just yesterday Paul called me from his cell phone and asked me to check the news for him because there were five helicopters buzzing over his head while he was on the freeway. Sure enough, there was a high-speed chase and all the news choppers were there to film it.

When you combine 3-5 news copters along with any police and/or medical helicopters in a small area, is it any surprise that tragedy may happen? Maybe it’s about time the news stations quit competing with each other to get the best pictures and start considering the safety of those they send out in the field. We can all thank God the helicopters didn’t crash into the playground at the park or a school, hospital or apartment building.

I’m so sad this happened today, but these are the first thoughts that come to the front of my mind. I’m sick of helicopters buzzing over my house and waking me up at 6am every morning, all in the name of journalism. 99% of the time there is no news at all and they’re just flying around looking for something to do.

I can’t help but think what happened today is not only a sad waste, but a tragedy that will be repeated until people stand up and demand that news stations leave the skies to those who belong there – the police and medical transportation

Trouble

2007-07-25T22:17:00.000-07:00

Mr. Innocent there managed to get himself kicked right out of preschool today! Yes, that’s right. I got a call around 10:30am this morning – that’s before lunch time even! “Mrs. D? This is –school-. Yeah, Aidan is having a little trouble this morning…”

Before we’re ready to lock Aidan up and throw away the key, I do need to give a little background on said school. This school is a little, I don’t know, snooty? Like, one time a poor kid got lice - doesn’t that happen now and again at every school? I’m telling you, I thought they were going to have to burn the place to the ground! It took them FOUR weeks before they’d allow Aidan to have his blankets for naptime. The place smelled like Lysol for weeks and the kids were subjected to head checks for a month!

I appreciated the attentiveness, but can you imagine being the poor parents whose child brought the great plague to the school? I’m much more worried about what would happen to my children if they accidentally defiled the snobby school than if they came home with a bug.

Not that I would like that either of course, but it was just overboard.

Another time when we were leaving, the kids were all hyped up on sugar and I had just brought them in from the playground. They had the audacity to actually RUN inside the building! As I finally caught up to them, the director actually took me to the side and explained to me in a calm patronizing manner “we don’t allow the children to run in the building. Could you please not allow that?” I was so surprised by the request that I just stammered an apology. When I got the demonic children loaded into the car I wanted to shout back “THANK YOU for letting me know that! Because up until now, I’ve always told the children to please run inside all buildings! Thanks for clearing that up for me!”

But, I always think of these things to late.

So back to the phone call. “Aidan has been biting other children today.” Me: “Really? He hasn’t done that in ages.” Teacher: “He hasn’t. But today he’s really having trouble. We’ve tried to separate him, but he just keeps doing it.” Me: “Is it just one child he’s having trouble with?” Teacher: “No. He’s bitten five children today…”

ACK! In two hours he managed to bite five other kids? Maybe he was hungry? I’ll have to give him a better breakfast tomorrow – something with meat maybe.

I have to say, I do like getting the day off of work, but this better be both the first AND last time this happens. I’m going to check some books out from the library about not biting. I had a talk with him, and scolded him a bit for being so naughty. I did put him right to nap when we got home, so he wouldn’t think he just got the most gigantic treat ever and equate biting with getting to come home. Other than that, there’s not much I can do. I mean, I’m not there when he does it. Punishing a three year old hours after he does something isn’t going to have much of an affect.

Let’s hope this is just a phase…

Dampened Kilts

2007-07-23T22:15:00.000-07:00

Would you like to read about our refreshing and relaxing weekend in the high-country of Arizona ? Then check out this article written by the AZ Daily Sun:

http://www.azdailysun.com/articles/2007/07/22/news/20070722_front%20page_16.txt

Since links to news articles don’t always work, or last very long before getting archived someplace else (where you have to pay for it), here’s some snippets from the story so nicely titled “Kilts Dampened, But Not Spirits”:

The northern Arizona air was damp and misty on Saturday, a sign of the monsoon times and a fitting backdrop to one of Flagstaff 's favorite summer events: the Arizona Highland Celtic Festival….Even at 5 p.m., after Saturday's events were beginning to wind down for the day and a series of monsoon storms had dampened the park, hundreds of festival goers continued to frequent the "Celtic Tavern," a large, canvas tent housing scores of folding tables. Irish, Scottish and Welsh whiskey flowed like water as the latest performer -- solo guitarist Alex Beaton -- played mournful refrains onstage.

"It was nice. Cooled everyone down," tavern tender and Northern Arizona Celtic Heritage Society volunteer Jim Buell said of the rain…."I actually think it added to the ambiance of the festival," Tillett said. "You know how Ireland and Scotland have that rainy, foggy atmosphere? It's really ambianic. Really ambianic," Tillett said.

Added to the ambiance? Rainy, foggy atmosphere? Go check out the photo I posted at the top of this page. The white stuff? That would be HAIL people! Does anyone get the feeling the reporter was writing her story from within the tavern? Maybe the spirits she claims were not dampened were the ones she was drinking!

We arrived Saturday morning at the Arizona Celtic festival and set up our folding chairs and cooler near the Highland Dance competition tent. Paul had been hired as the piper for the dance competition, which was cool because he not only got paid to be there, but we got our tickets for the whole family provided and two free hotel nights!

Men in skirts get paid well!

The kiddos and I headed over to the children’s play area. I have to say, the festival had one of the best children’s area I had ever seen. Aidan kept busy blowing bubbles and playing in the “ponds” – some kiddie pools set up with toys to fish and splash around in, and Brigid spent time playing a game where she threw Mardi-Graz type necklaces at a cardboard mermaid. What could be more fun? This left me time to peruse the nearby stands for folk-art jewelry and Celtic goodies, as long as I could still see the kids.

Around 11:00, I heard the rumble of distant thunder and it began to sprinkle, so I gathered the kids to walk back to our chairs and dig lunch out of the cooler. I wasn’t worried about a little rain because I brought umbrellas. How prepared I was.

Brigid sat down in her Hello Kitty Chair and Aidan in his SpongeBob chair, and they cracked open their Lunchables (yes, lazy mom moment) and lemonade, when the sprinkle turned to great big splatting drops. This is no problem for super-prepared mom! I just set up my folding chair behind the two of them and popped open my two, yes two, umbrellas over their sweet little heads! The three of us huddled under our homemade shelter and happily ate our snacks. Until…

WHOSH! The wind started whipping the suddenly bucket-pouring rain in a sideways direction. I lowered the umbrellas and tilted them sideways so we had an A-frame shape to our shelter. I could still protect the little heads from getting drenched, but I didn’t know how long I could hold up against the wind. I looked down and the kids were still lazily munching on their crackers and bologna circles and watching the rain.

BANG! A bolt of lightning cracked to the ground, no more than a mile away, according to the 5 second rule! There really was no safe shelter to run to, and many tents set up were higher than us, so for the time it seemed our little umbrella home might be the safest place to be. The storm must be about over after all…

FWAP! FWAP! FWAP! Crap! Marble sized hail started pelting my behind! The more I tried to shelter the children with the umbrellas, the more I had to bend down and expose my butt to thousands of sharp ice pellets falling from the sky at 60mph! Drat the new low-riding style jeans that did little to cover my backside, and I needed to decide quickly how to save my butt and my family from the “ambiotic rainy and foggy atmosphere” that was filling my shorts with ice, before the next bolt of lightning finished us off!

I may be prone to exaggeration, but this was no Highland Mist here, folks.

A woman in a nearby tent witnessed my failed attempts at sheltering my family and took pity on our plight. She came running to us across the field with a plastic tarp and draped it over us (and my butt). We now became a mobile shelter and I used the tarp to cover all three of us as we ran to our savior’s tent to take real cover! There, the wonderful angel offered my babies a quilt to warm up in and some candy to calm them. Of course, they didn’t need calming. They were having the time of their lives!

And where was Paul during all of this? He was blissfully unaware of the peril his family was in – in their makeshift shelter of two umbrellas and a tarp. He had taken shelter under the roof of the dance competition area. He had important bagpipes to protect after all!

I'm glad our reporter on the scene was enjoying the ambiance of a Scottish mist from the window of the tavern. I was able to enjoy myself also - once I got all the ice pellets out of my butt...

Highland Weekend

2007-07-20T22:14:00.000-07:00

The Northern Arizona Celtic Festival is happening this weekend, so you know where we’ll be! Paul is the main piper this year for the Highland Dance competition. I will be posting pictures, because, I love men in skirts.
Bonus points to anyone who can identify what Paul is playing in this picture.
The instrument, not the song...
Happy Weekend!

It's Like Magic!

2007-07-19T22:13:00.000-07:00

HARRY POTTER AND THE DEATHLY HALLOWS COMES OUT TOMORROW!!!! YAY!!!! My Amazon.com order is on its way right now!

There… I said it. Count me in with the millions dying to find out what happens to our witch hero Harry (aren’t males supposed to be warlocks?). Usually I’m one to buck trends, but this time I’m right there with the rest of society.

I may as well start watching American Idol now.

Down in my “interests” sections I entered “reading” as if nobody else in the world would have that. After all, aren’t most people surfing the internet interesting in reading? The addition of videos has been a recent phenomenon and certainly isn’t the majority of the internet.

But I do believe I’m unique in my reading fanaticism. I have spent hours… make that days reading online books now posted on Google Books. My bed stand is heaped over with books spilling onto the floor, and I annoy Paul to no end most nights keeping the light on late into night – meaning past 9:00pm since he’s a morning person (ewwww…). He bought me one of those little reading lights you can put on your ear, but I keep running the batteries out on it, so I have to turn my lamp back on. I read that much. Let’s not forget my toilet and surrounding area is covered with magazines and catalogs. With my busy schedule, it tends to become my library since it is the only place that offers me any good quality reading time.

I’m also a library fanatic, which should come as no surprise to anyone who knows my extreme cheapness practical-ness. I routinely have 20 books checked out at one time (this includes the kids’ books) and visit the library on a weekly basis or more! It pains me to actually buy the new Harry Potter book, but I know it could be months before the library has any available copies.

The majority of what I read is non-fiction. Truth is stranger than fiction, and more entertaining! I love biographies and history the most. But if I do read fiction, it tends to be science fiction or fantasy, so it was no surprise to me that I would get caught up in Harry Potter. What surprises me is that pop-culture got caught up in Harry Potter!

I guess there is hope for society yet!

I’m happy to know I’m not alone as an adult who has read all six books in the Harry Potter series. When we were at Target recently, Brigid spotted a Harry Potter coloring book in the kid’s area and she loudly asked me “Mom! I found a Harry Potter coloring book for you! It’s your favorite!” I was tempted… but no. I’ve never been much of an artist after all.

I’m happy that my geeky science-fiction reading personality has finally found itself caught up in something the rest of society is interested in.

I’m trendy!

Happy Little Visit

2007-07-17T22:09:00.000-07:00

I’ve been back in the blast furnace of Arizona for 24 hours now, so I’m just getting around to posting and letting everyone know we made it home safe and sound! It was so great seeing those of you we were able to get together with. For those of you who we didn’t see (or didn’t even know we were in town) I humbly apologize. This trip was supposed to be our nice long annual trip. However, since it was our THIRD trip up north this year, we had to make it very very short. I simply couldn’t get together with many people. Here’s the very quick and dirty version of our trip:

Wed: Landed in Minneapolis, rented our huge mini van (shall we call it a mega van?) and drove just a few miles to eat dinner with Paul’s aunt Barb at her house. We then drove down to Rochester where we went grocery shopping at midnight so we’d have some food in the house for morning. Only really strange people grocery shop at midnight. Strange people and us.

Thurs: I took the kids to the big “Kids Coulee” park where we met dad. We then met aunt Stacey at the La Crosse county fair. I then packed them all up and we went to mom’s house for dinner. This involved also the kids dragging me to the park across the street. They spent more time outside than inside that day! But, to end the day with a big bang, when we got home we lit a big fire in the outside fireplace and roasted marshmallows. Paul went to good ol’ K-Mart and bought a big package of leftover fireworks from the Fourth of July and we lit off at least ½ the package! It was our own mini fireworks and bonfire.

Fri: At noon we all got in the van and picked up my brother Craig, his wife Stacey and new little baby Ruth and headed off to Milwaukee for our cousin Whitney’s wedding! We made it in time to check into our hotel. It wasn’t my fault my directions were faulty and led us to the wrong hotel… a few times. We made it to the rehearsal dinner at the church basement. Visited with cousin Janet who I mentioned in my last post, we haven’t seen in years, and also with all kinds of old friends and family. Well, they aren’t all old I guess.

Sat: Wedding, Reception and back in the van at 9pm to drive to La Crosse. We made it home by 2am. We were getting kind of tired by now.

Sun: Back in the van for a trip to Spring Grove, MN to visit Paul’s aunt Frieda, Grace’s sister. It was wonderful to see her, but by now we were very cranky and tired. Back home by 3pm for a quick nap and time to pack up.

Mon: Cleaned up the house and back home again! We made it in the door by around 8pm.

Someday maybe we’ll move back and then we can all spend as much time together as we could possibly want. Do you miss us? We miss you. All of you. Yes… even you.

We miss La Crosse. The trees and clean air strengthened our hearts and minds. Never mind that Paul went on a big tree cutting rampage on Sunday afternoon. We wanted to thin out the woods make a better view of the river. Only one tree fell on the house and ripped the gutter off, but it didn’t break any windows. And those of you that know us KNOW I’m not kidding.

We’re tired, but I have to say, the trip was really really fun, especially after the sadness of our last two visits this year. It was sad not to have Grace there, even for me! She would’ve loved to see the children laughing and running through the grass. Her grass. It was the one thing that made her happy in life, and we like to remember the good and happy times.

Whirlwind Adventure

2007-07-12T22:06:00.000-07:00

Just letting everyone know that we will be up in Minnesota/Wisconsin until Monday. It's a quick trip this time. This is actually the anual trip that we've had planned for nearly a year... before everything happened this year. My cousin, Whitney, is getting married in Milwaukee. I've taken so much time off work this year that I couldn't make this a very long trip - although the plane trip costs the same whether it's a 5 day or 2 week trip. Why not just blow through more cash though? I didn't want to miss the wedding. I have never met my cousin Janet's children, and have only met my cousin Jackie's oldest daughter when she was a baby. This may be the last time we all get together, so the cost is well worth it.

More long stories for another day alas!

So this will be the 3rd trip in 6 months with the whole family travling by air. I hate flying. There is nothing redeeming about it, except it does get you where you're going quickly. I guess that's why we do it.

Love you all and see many of you soon...

And you are asking what the picture is? That's me and Aidan mooing at each other. We're going to Wisconsin you know.

Three

2007-07-08T22:05:00.000-07:00

Three years ago today – can it be three years since I woke up around midnight, about 2 weeks before I was due to deliver my baby and OW! OW! OW’ed my way all the way to the hospital? Three years ago today Aidan was placed into my arms for the very first time.

It was three years ago today when our one-year-old daughter came skipping into my hospital room and completely ignored her new baby brother. We were so worried she’d be traumatized by a baby suddenly coming in and with me being away from her for a few nights. She surprised us as usual by completely ignoring him for the first few months and continued to just be her demanding self as if nothing had changed.

But changed it had! Now the two siblings are nearly inseparable. I can’t imagine life with just one. I love to watch them tumble and wrestle like little puppies.

The first year with two in diapers is a blurr in my mind. If I look at pictures from that first year, I often wonder if it really happened or not. At the time, it never seemed that bad, but when I look back now, I don’t know how we did it.

I have given away almost all the baby items to make room for “kid” items. The little baby onsies and booties went off to charity and the rattles and mobiles went to other babies who could still play with them. Life keeps moving on.

I’m not getting any younger either.

I love every age, and I do love seeing the kids grow up. I also love getting a little more of myself back since, after three straight years I can finally sleep an entire night… most nights. There is the occasional bad dream or bed wetting wake-up call, but most nights are peaceful. These have truly been the happiest years of my life. I never would’ve believed that going into this adventure.

Stressful, but the happiest.

Even The Cat Won't Go Outside

2007-07-02T22:41:00.000-07:00

Why do I live here again?

Rollie The Meow!

2007-06-29T22:38:00.000-07:00

All this time I’ve been writing about our family, and I’m terribly ashamed I’ve been leaving someone out. I introduce to all – Rollie the Cat!

Rollie joined us in April of 2005 after the sad passing of Sammie. Brigid was only two, so I didn’t think she’d comprehend the fact that we had to take Sammie and have him put to sleep. Taken from a previous journal of mine, written 4/18/05:

______________________________________________________________________

I wanted to sadly announce that we had to put our 14 year old "first baby" to sleep this weekend. He was struggling with kidney disease for at least 2 years now, and after months of watching him decline we decided it really was time. Although I don't regret it because he was not getting better, I felt so horrible at the time I can hardly get over it. I felt like I totally was betraying him, holding him on the table while he fought the anesthesia, although I know I was really being his friend by helping him cross-over in a humane way.

Brigid has only a slight comprehension of what happened. I brought her over to him before we took him in to say good-bye. She fed him some treats through his cage and I told her he wasn't coming back and this was bye-bye. When we returned later without him, she didn't ask. Before bed she asked about him and said "I miss Sammy." I said "I miss him too. You got to tell him bye-bye today, and that was nice" and she replied "and I gave him a star and a circle." It took me a bit to realize what she was talking about, when Paul said that was the shapes of the kitty treats she fed him.

Although I don't even want to own a plant right now after going through this, I have a feeling we'll have another cat by the end of the week. I like getting older cats because they're already trained and mellowed out, but might not be the best thing with the little ones. Kittens don't have any trouble getting adopted, but older cats really need a home. Then again, maybe we should just skip the whole cat thing since we have enough work with two babies! It's just hard because I want to fill the void of our missing family member, since we all loved Sammy so much. I know I can't replace him, but maybe a new cat would take away some of the sting.

______________________________________________________________________

Way back then, I never did tell Brigid what happened to Sammie, but she kept asking for years if he was coming back “from the doctor.” I’m telling you, up until this year, I was no expert on handling the death thing, and if I’ve learned anything it’s not to underestimate how much even a small child can comprehend!

So a few months later when the terrible sadness of Sammie’s passing had lessoned, we went to the shelter to find another kitty. We always make it a point to adopt an adult cat or dog from the shelter because they have a very hard time finding a home. It was a hard choice because we wanted to take them all home, but we chose a beautiful 3 year old Calico.

She was so happy right away when we brought her home that she stretched out on the carpet and started rolling around. If you pet her, she rolled one way to the other so you would be forced to pet her entire body, and not just her back or side. Her pushiness convinced us we had found the perfect cat to fit into our family. Brigid just started calling her “Rollie Kitty” and that stuck. It’s a strange name, but she’s a cat so she doesn’t care. It’s better than Fur Face or Stink Ass after all. Those weren’t my ideas.

I have to admit, Rollie isn’t the smartest cat I’ve ever owned or known. She’s one of those fluff balls who plasters herself to anyone within a 100 miles willing to look at her, let alone pet her. She scratches things and howls at night, which drives us to distraction. But she’s great with the kids and they enjoy having her. All families should have a pet, even if they mat their hair into every inch of available fabric in any piece of furniture in the house.

Who cares. Unconditional love trumps that.

Do Blonds Have More Fun?

2007-06-24T22:37:00.000-07:00

I changed my profile picture to something a little more current. I admit it - I've lightened my hair color. I never in a bazillion trillion years thought I'd lighten my hair this much, but what the heck? I have always loved my chestnut brown haircolor. But the problem is, it's not really brown anymore. It's sort of like the ol' chestnut tree got stuck in a snowstorm, if you get my drift (drift... heh heh... I made a funny).

My hairstylist is a bit pushy with the color. "I know vat you vant. You no need tell me. Here!" I'm a little intimidated by her. She's always speaking Russian to her assitants and they look over at me with a gleam in their eye for a monent, before I look scared and they laugh. Ha Ha HA! I'm thinking she is saying "If ze girl vont follow ze plan, you vill go slice her tires an she vill never leave until ve 'av waxed and plucked her entire pocketbook. Ha ha HA!"

I told her that I found a free software on the internet that teaches you how to speak Russian for FREE! For a moment she looked wide eyed at me and asked "'Av you been learning ze Russian ya?" She looked quite relieved when I told her I hadn't started yet. But mark my word! One day I will be sitting in the chair and totally understand their plot to overthrow my fashion emergency life and turn me into Paris Hilton!

Seriously - I love them. It's the best few hours of my month (or 2 months) when I get to sit around and get pampered to and change everything about myself. Heaven forbid I just look old and natural.

An Expensive Language

2007-06-19T22:36:00.000-07:00

How do I learn German in the next couple months? As you may have read from my previous posts, learning German has been a priority in this household. I know that even with my extensive language training in the past, even I can't expect to learn much more than a few phrases. Unlike my daughter, I don't have the luxury of immersing myself in a 3 week summer camp. She *can* count to 10 now after all... in German!

A couple months ago we were in the Minneapolis Airport, letting the kids play in one of the play areas. Next to the jungle gym thing there was a big yellow kiosk with a "Rosetta Stone" sign on it. Have you seen the many ads for this software? Promises to be the best and quickest way to learn a language, right from your own home, at your own computer... yadda yadda.

A tall blond woman with some kind of vague foreign accent was manning the Kiosk. I'll call her Olga, because she looked like she was pretending to be a Scandinavian born beauty. I suspect the accent was a ruse to make her appear more wordlyy and she was actually named Jennifer and was from southern California. Her ruse was working wonders for her sales, since I was the only woman looking at the software and had to fight my way through the hoards of horny college guys trying to impress her by laying down wads of cash for her goods. I'm sure they were sad the only goods they got was the yellow box.

I allowed Olga/Jennifer to show me the software, and in my desperation I asked her how much it was. Nearly $200! For only level 1!! Good God if I didn't lay down the cash because I just want to quicksoloution to my problem.

In the past couple months I've been happily pleased with the software and have played the little German lessons. I can now also count to 10 and say neat things like "The Car is Red" or "The boy is on the table." I know the second one will come in use since we're briningg Aidan.

Tonight I was surfing around on the Phoenix PublicLibarary's website and reserving some Thomas books for Aidan, Princess books for Brigid and history books for myself. At the top of the page I saw a link for "learning resources". I clicked it and there was a link for "Rosetta Stone lessons." Huh. So I clicked into it and...

The entire software lessons are FREE!! Drat you public library!! How dare you offer the public something totally free that I have already paid $200 for!!

Okay, I'm seriously happy. Because now I can get level 2 for free AND after I'm done with German I can practice my Chinese again! And Spanish! And then I can learn Turkish and Swaheli ahtfJapanese! It's like crack for my nerdy brain. I may never again emerge from my computer remmergeich would make learning another language to communicate with people rather useless I guess.

Oh the irony.

Dang! I could've had a...

2007-06-18T22:34:00.000-07:00

True story. Tonight I gave Brigid a choice for what drink she wanted with her dinner of mashed potatoes, cheese and cucumbers (she picked that out herself).

A) Chocolate Milk

B) Kool Aide

C) Water

Now remember, she is 4 years old. Her answer may astound you: "Do we have any V8 juice??" She's not referring to those fruity blends the V8 company has come out with in the past few years. She was begging for the plain old tomato juice.

She LOVES it. In my opinion the stuff is kinda... yuck. I can drink it when it's offered to me, but when given the choice of almost anything else, it gets pushed pretty far back in my book of favorites. I barely even remember how she got her first glorious taste of the thick dark red vegetable salty drink. I'm pretty sure Paul was drinking a can of it when she was around one, and she thought it was the most wonderful thing she had ever tasted. Ever since then she has begged for it consistently.

I'm not making this up!

We were at Target a few months ago, and the kids wanted to have a snack in the food area. They had the typical pizza and hot dogs and Slurpee machines twirling away. We were in a busy line of kids ordering up their blue and neon green concoctions in front of us, and I fully expected to hear the begging shortly.

What actually made the entire line go quit was Brigid squealing "Look mommy! They have V8 juice!! Yippee!!! V8 JUICE!!!" Just to make a show for the parents looking at me like I must be a Nazi military mom I asked her if she might like a Slurpee and pizza instead. "No no!! I want V8 juice!! Please mommy?!" She then fell over herself when she found out they had packages of carrots with ranch dip, and desperately wanted that instead of pizza.

I paid for my tray full of vegetables and V8 juice and passed by the tables of kids eating pizza, chips and sugar-power-icey-drink. Obviously my superior parenting has prevailed at this moment! I am queen parent of the Target snack area!

Or maybe it has nothing to do with my parenting and I just have a very very strange child.

International School

2007-06-14T22:00:00.000-07:00

Where was I 10 years ago today? Let me think? Oh yes. I was in a city of sweltering heat surrounded by young children learning a foreign language. That city happened to be Taipei and I happened to be the teacher at a summer camp for Chinese children. What the hell was I thinking? Maybe that I’d get a free trip out of the deal. But it was only free in the way that working 17 hours a day in substandard conditions is free. And by substandard I mean things like sleeping on a wooden board with no pillow or blankets in a room with no air-conditioning where we were fed breakfasts of canned tuna and soy milk.

I didn’t say I didn’t enjoy myself, but I did find myself smoking multiple packs of cheap cigarettes and finding any excuse to escape to the “discos”. The good ol’ days.

Now lets swing ahead 10 years to the Tina I am today. I’m living in a city of sweltering heat surrounded by young children learning a foreign language at a summer camp! Who would’ve known? That city would be Scottsdale, AZ and those children would be my very own little angels. Paul signed up Brigid at the International School of Arizona for a summer camp of language immersion!

Of course, this summer camp couldn’t be just around the corner from here, but clear in south Scottsdale. Thus in order to immerse my little cherub in her international experience, I had to change my work schedule to an ungodly 6:30am – 3:30pm so I can pick her up in the afternoon. Paul drops her of on the way to work around 9am. I’m fortunate to have an understanding boss who doesn’t want me to quit to be a stay-at-home-mom. It’s all about work life balance. Or something…

The cool thing is Brigid is really really enjoying herself. She learned the word for ice cream this week in German. It’s “ice”. I’m glad we’re spending top dollar for her education. She also can count to 10, which I also have just learned to do. I think at this rate, by August we should be truly ready to take over the European continent.

Seriously, it’s a cool school. I wish I could spend my day there. The teachers are from all over the world and speak in multiple languages to the children all day. I can picture her little German teacher screaming “setzt dich!” like I screamed “sit down!” in English to my Chinese students. Children understand what’s being said no matter what culture they are or what language it’s said in. Because teachers, across the world, are cruel. And I’m proud to have been one of them.

Writing

2007-06-08T22:31:00.000-07:00

I was asked this week where I find time in my busy life to keep up a blog. Well, I have to have some kind of hobby! On the surface level, I just love writing and expressing myself. I also like having one convenient spot to keep everyone up to date on our lives. It’s also been a fun forum to meet some new friends!

On a deeper level, I love writing so much because, should anything happen to me, at least people can get a glimpse into who I really was. The past few years have been full of losses from my life. Memories only last as long as people are alive to remember them. The written word can last forever.

Now, I’m not saying that my little blog is profound enough to withstand the test of time. I just personally have a real craving for stories from the past, and maybe my children and grandchildren, should I have any, will appreciate knowing what day-to-day life was like around the turn of the millennium.

They may not be interested in stinky feet stories, but you know, the other stuff.

I crave stories from the past, especially regular day-to-day type stories. I really love reading how mom’s in the 17 or 1800’s raised children in completely different circumstances than we have today. How did they do it without being able to turn on SpongeBob every now and then? It’s no wonder the lifespan was shorter.

In the past 2 years, my mother’s parents who we all loved so much, both passed away. Over the years, I was very close to my grandmother and I spent many long summer days during school breaks at my grandparent’s farm. They only lived about 45 min away, so their home was really a second home for us. Those are memories I need to write down as well, but maybe in a memoir format.

However, a fun thing to share here in my blog is an email my grandma sent me over 7 years ago. Even in her 70’s and 80’s, grandma kept up with technology and was on the World Wide Web. She especially delighted in faxing long letters to me while I was at work, much to the delight of our secretary. I reprint this email to show that I owe a big part of my funniness directly to her. And I have all her wonderfully funny emails that I can pass down to my future generations, who can also get a few laughs from them.

> From: ge7602@prodigy.net [SMTP:ge7602@prodigy.net]
> Sent: Saturday, January 29, 2000 9:16 AM
> To: Tina
> Subject: Somedays it works
>
> Good afternoon, are you keeping warm? We are nice and cozy, in fact gramp shut the bedroom door when he got up at the ungodly hour a 3"30 AM, and ignighted the fireplace, I woke up about seven and was freezing my ass off, so got up and when I oend the bedroom door, it was like a blast furnace, he had the fireplace going full tilt, and was sound asleep in his chair. He and Jingles were both snoozing really well in that heat.

I fnally got my teeth yesterday, they are beautiful, you would never know they are dentures, I don't whistle when I talk, nor do I drool, you can bet I thought I would have all of that, but the training dentures I had for four months kinda broke me in. The first thing I did when I came home was eat an apple, didn't cut it up or peel it, and when I was finished I called the dentist office and told them what I had accomplished and said I was going to have the core bronzed.

it's a bunch of bullshit getting old, some damned thing or another has to be fixed all of the time---Like an old car---if you want it to run, you gotta fix it up.

How is the job search going? How did you do on your exams? How is Sammy the great squirell hunter? Old fat Jingles is same as always, needs her ass washed today, I've been putting if off, but before bedtime it has to be done---Bahhhhh.

I am trying to think of something good for dinner, that will make it's self, guess we could eat cat food, just dump it in a bowl and wow!!! Probabley be hot dogs, I am not in the cooking mood;.

I am crocheting again, I have a very large Rubbermaid storage chest about half full of baby things---some one is going to be very lucky some day, We have pink, we have white, we have peach, we have pastels and white, we have knit, we have crocheted, we have a grannie that's a bit nuts.

well my DARLING GRANDAUGTER. I love you and yours, hugs and kisses

-----------Shotgun (my new nickname--honest) I have a message on the answering machine that I recorded as such "We're not here to answer the phone, so please leave a message after the tone, but if your a burgler we're not gone at all, we're cleaning our shotgun while screening your call"--The girls at the dentists office called to remind me of my appointment one day,and got the machine, they were so tickled over it that they called back and put it on the speaker so everyone in the offices could hear it, so now I am Shotgun. I kinda like it, never having had a nick name before. bye bye

More Entries To Blackmail Aidan With In the Future

2007-06-03T22:30:00.000-07:00

Poor Aidan. One day I’m writing about his stinky feet, and now I’m going to discuss his potty training. But it’s been a very successful weekend and I would be slacking in my duties to all of you if I didn’t share all the exciting details. These ARE the days of our lives after all!

All our hard work is paying off! We’ve been working on potty training Aidan for about 6 months, and up until now it’s been hit-or-miss at best (and we hate misses). The things is, all along, he’s never had trouble going on the potty. The problem has been he hasn’t had trouble going anywhere. I put him on the potty - he pees. I put him in his pants – he pees. I put him in pull-ups – he pees. No diaper? He pees. So our trouble has been getting him to put that pee in the one and only acceptable place. That place is not the floor, and heaven forbid the bathtub. I really hate that.

Last night we went out to eat at a nice restaurant. Well, nice if you like sawdust on the floor, country music and cowboy hats. We are in Arizona you know. We had just sat down to our appetizers of chicken wings and nachos (and BEER… apparently my favorite beverage) when Aidan suddenly announced in a panicked tone “I have to go potty! I have to go potty! I have ta GO!!” Paul and I looked at each other with puzzled expressions. Was he joking around? I mean, he’s never cared about peeing whenever and wherever his little heart desired.

I whisked him off to the restroom. Along the way he put his hand on his jewels and announced to every table “I go to za bafroom! I going potty!” He’s not a shy kid, and I’m used to getting snickered at whenever I’m with him out in public. We made it just in time for me to pull down his dry drawers and, darned if he didn’t put his pee in the appropriate receptacle for once. When we got home, his pants were totally dry and he went again in the potty at home.

I’ve never known potty training to go from zero to sixty like that. One day nothing, and the next day DONE. Of course, I’ve only potty trained one other kid, so what do I know.

The problem now is I’m not trained to have him potty trained! This happened so suddenly that I totally forget that I have to bring him to the potty now. Diapers, as nasty as they are to change, are really really easy. Put one on, and you’re worry free for the next few hours. Now he totally refuses to go in them! I forgot to set him on the potty before naptime today, and the poor kid woke up soaked from head to toe! He must’ve been holding it for hours, and he let go when he was asleep. Pampers may advertise they are able to hold an entire liquid-filled balloon, but they were no match for Aidan’s bladder.

Of course, I’m thrilled and I hope this lasts. At least for awhile. We still have the occasional accident with Brigid. If I have enough BEER, even I might have a slip up I suppose.

A Rose Would Smell So Sweet

2007-05-30T22:35:00.000-07:00

News Flash: It’s hot in Arizona. It’s HOT. But we’ve lived here over 4 years now, so our blood is all “thinned out” as they say. We’re just like the locals and find us saying things like “you want to go swimming? But it’s only 95, are you crazy? You’ll freeze!”

They also say it’s a dry heat. The best thing about the heat being dry is that you don’t sweat. At least, it doesn’t appear that you sweat, because it all evaporates before you can see the big ring of sweat under your arm. And this is where the problem lies…

I was carrying Aidan on Saturday evening after a long day of activities and *sniff* *sniff*… dang. Must be a nasty full diaper going on there. But I checked him, and he was fresh as a Midwest spring mornin’. Again I *sniff* *sniffed*… geeze… I must not’ve seen the mess the first time. I took off his diaper and there was really nothing there. Gads! I sure hope that’s not me! I put Aidan down and the sour-rotten nastiness subsided, so I felt 90% sure it wasn’t me stinking up the room. I even forgot about the stink for the moment.

Finally right before dinner I went to take off Aidan’s shoes and… HOLY MOTHER OF… THAT’s where the smell is coming from! How could a 2 year old could manage to do that to his shoes? I mean, this wasn’t any ordinary sweaty sock stink. This was entire football team gym-locker stink! I couldn’t even hold the shoes near me without starting to gag!

I could barely breathe and told Paul that I was about to throw his shoes in the trash and the trash in another trash, and that outside a few miles away. He gave me the infamous Paul “no-way” eye-roll, and before I could stop him he took a nice long *SNIFF* instead of just a *sniff*. His eyes suddenly got wide as he dropped the shoes and fell back and started to choke, “You need to WARN me before I do that next time! You trying to KILL me?!” Really I think he was secretly proud his own son could produce such a powerful odor. It’s a guy thing.

We tried to theorize how a 2 year old could stink up a little pair of shoes to that degree. Paul of course blamed my stinky genes. No way that kind of killer foot stink is coming from my side of the family, right dad?! Now, maybe if he had a deafening snoring or a farting problem I could see that…

Paul ran over to CVS and came back with two different cans of foot-fungal spray and a deodorant spray. I carried Aidan like a dead rat over to the sink and scrubbed up cute little stinky footies and he giggled, unaware that his smell nearly fried our eyeballs. Paul sprayed the shoes with the deodorizer and we waited. You know what would happen if you placed a rose on top of a dung heap? Now the room smelled like a 90 degree gym locker room with a bouquet in it.

Not to ever waste anything perfectly good and usable (I guess), I just threw the shoes in the sink and scrubbed them up with good old fashioned soap and water. The amazing thing was… it worked. His fresh little toes can now enter his cleaned up little sneakers without ripping a hole in the ozone layer. But we're taking precautions from now on and he’s wearing fresh socks everyday, and as soon as we get home, the shoes come off and the feet go in the tub. We all made it through alive this time, but I'm not taking any chances.

Beer And Soup

2007-05-24T22:33:00.000-07:00

For Mother's Day, Brigid was asked to "fill out" a questionaire all about me. Obviously, the teacher helped her write her answers. Some of her answers were just funny like

How Old is your Mom? 10

How Tall is your Mom? 10in

But the answers that mystified me the most were

What's your Mom's favorite drink? Beer

What's your Mom's favorite food? Soup

Wow! She's so insightful for a 4 year old! I mean, I hardly ever drink beer around her and I can't remember when the last time I had a bowl of soup around her was. Maybe she was reading my blog about going to Germany? Or maybe she is getting back to our Wisconsin roots where beer and soup actually go together into one bowl along with a big hunk of cheese!

Sometimes I really have to wonder where she gets her data from.

Loss For Words (Part II)

2007-05-22T22:32:00.000-07:00

I will now continue with my post on our Minnesota trip and why I took time off from writing. When I started this page, I only intended to place light-hearted fun entries about our life and the kids. I like to be funny, and I deal with almost every trial in life by joking around. But the week after we returned home, I lost my funny.

I’ve also struggled with wondering if I should write any more about Grace at all. What’s done is done and you can’t go back. But I feel we do owe it to everyone who cares and has followed along the last few months to know what we know. I have no intention of dragging her name through the mud, but almost everyday, someone asks me the question “did you ever find out what actually happened to her?”

Yes. We did.

On the day we returned to Arizona, in the mail we had the autopsy report waiting for us. Grace’s death was ruled an “accident” - due to overdose. Although we had theorized that might’ve been the cause due to what we found next to her in our guest bedroom and her strange symptoms that fateful night, until we saw it officially on paper, it didn’t feel real. We were still holding out that maybe it was due to natural causes like a stroke or heart attack. Something that would’ve felt more like it was just her time.

The number one cause of death was due to Morphine overdose, but her blood also contained sleeping medications, codeine, and depression medications; the type of cocktail that “accidentally” killed Anna Nicole Smith. Only… Grace was a nurse for over 40 years and knew very well the dangers of what she ingested. And not only was she not prescribed Morphine, she was allergic to it, and she knew that.

There was no valiant fight against some grave illness. There was no horrible traffic accident. She was not murdered. She did this to herself – accidental or not. And because she did this to herself, we feel both feel sorrow and resentment toward her. That's hard to reconcile. How do I feel? I don't know. She made her decision, and that's that.

But she did it right in our home, in front of us and the children. Brigid, at 4 years old, watched one of her most beloved people on earth, die right in front of her. I’m the one who has to live with the fact that it was I who found her unconscious on the floor and did not call 911 – I thought she was fine. Paul has to not only live with the fact that he told her to “just go lay down”, but the feelings of “if I just hadn’t said…” and blaming himself. Although the two had not fought, they had a deep, intense discussion the night before about things in “the past”, and he feels may have pushed her over the edge. None of it’s logical, and people tell us all day long not to blame ourselves. These are the feelings she leaves us as her legacy.

Paul is no longer in action-mode over the death, so has moved into a whole new stage of grieving. It’s a horrible thing for me to just stand by and watch, because I don’t share in his deep pain. I have caught him sniffling at all hours of the day and night, silently grappling with the fact that he no longer has parents. He isn’t sleeping well and he’s intensely irritable. Honestly, I think he’s also grieving the loss of his father, who died suddenly of a heart attack when he was 16. That loss too was completely sudden for him, and he may have never properly grieved his loss in all these years. It’s like it’s all coming together for him now, and a huge grieving process has to take place.

Yet spring is turning into summer now, and life is moving on. My funny is coming back and we find ourselves making new plans for the future. We can theorize for the rest of our lives on what really happened, but the truth is, we will never really know. It’s such a sad, sad thing to have happened - such a waste. Brigid will grow up without her beloved Nanna, and Aidan… Aidan won’t even remember her at all. She will just be some pictures and stories to him, lumped together with all other ancestors that have passed before. She was in perfect health and could’ve been around another 20 years or more, but in one simple, fatal decision, she’s gone.

A pointless, stupid “accident”.

A Day Out With Thomas

2007-05-20T22:29:00.000-07:00

I got my camera!!! I'm back up and picturing again!!! Just in time for yet another weekend of joy with the kids.

I'm getting all fancy with my entry today! I'm making it Blue for Thomas the Tank Engine, because that was what the weekend was all about. Thomas, Thomas and more Thomas. It was the happiest day of Aidan's life.

I have to admit, I wasn't exactly looking forward to this weekend. We had tickets for "A Day Out With Thomas", which involved spending the entire day up in northern Arizona to see Thomas the Tank Engine. But I have to admit... I actually had... fun. The weather was beautiful and the activities at the festival were almost enjoyable even for adults. The train ride was pretty scenic and good wholesome fun for the family. We've had enough good wholesome family fun the last month to turn us into the Cleaver's, but after everything that's happened, the timing is perfect to get away and spend time together.

And I promise to put "Part II" up tomorrow. I'm slow... I know.

And no need to write anymore, because I posted our weekend trip into a photo album! If you so choose, you can watch a slideshow of our trainy weekend by clicking the photos in the upper right corner of my "top page".

And if you would like to vote us for family of the year, we're accepting nominations.

Loss For Words (Part I)

2007-05-17T22:28:00.000-07:00

I’m also at a loss for pictures, since I haven’t yet received the memory card for the replacement camera that I bought on Ebay.

Why at a losss for words? For one thing, I’m a bit exhausted trying to get back to my full-time job and raising 2 children after two trips across the country in two months! I haven’t shared much from our latest trip up north, but besides the awful task of wrapping up Grace’s life, we did really enjoy the time there. Paul’s brother Mike flew out from Utah to help us move furniture and do the heavy lifting. Mike is really a work-hard/play-hard type person, so he’s perfect to have around when you have a lot to get done, but want to mix some fun in as well.

Lately I’ve felt too exhausted to come up with fun myself, so I need it thrust at me. With Mike around, we always end up buying at least 3 boxes of ice cream from the store, to make sure all of our picky needs are met, although we all feel guilty because are all on perpetual diets!

Since I’m just a girl, I was mostly delegated to playing around in the kitchen and watching the children. After all, someone had to take them to the park and play outside all day and come up with snacks while the men worked! I also got to take the kids to spend many valuable hours with my own mom, dad, brother and family, including a trip to visit my dad’s 86 year old mom – Grandma Vernie (where I lost my camera, alas).

Being the only female, I was also given the task of cleaning out Grace's master bedroom. Grace enjoyed shopping and had many many drawers and dressers full of underwear, slips, hosiery and girly unmentionables that the men-folk don’t have the stamina to deal with. I couldn’t really expect Paul to pick through his deceased mom’s under things. I opened one drawer at a time, picked through the neatly folded silky underpants, all the while thinking – oh god! Do I have to actually touch these?? But I couldn’t just dump the whole drawer, because she had a habit of hiding and storing valuables in her drawers.

It was like an Easter Egg hunt! Only, through a dead woman’s underwear instead of the fresh grass. We found 20 dollar bills that were so old, the Phoenix airport parking attendant wouldn’t accept them because he thought they were fakes! But I’m not complaining about finding money, no matter how old it is!

After I dug out the envelopes of cash, I kept a couple slips and some un-opened packages of hose, but otherwise everything traveled its way into the dumpster. I may be cheap, but I don’t wear used underwear. Although, if Kathe R. is reading this, she knows I’m not beyond wearing the same pair of underwear, day after day, while washing them in a sink and drying them while wearing them with a hair dryer because I’m stuck out of the country and only remembered to pack one stupid pair. But I will not borrow anyone else’s!

The big news from our visit was that we have decided to keep the house for now. It really was too much to clean out and sell in such a short period of time. The home is filled with family heirlooms and memories that Paul is not ready to part with yet. We would have to pay to ship and store them anyway, so it makes sense to just keep them where they are. The house is on 5 acres of wooded land on a bluff high above the city. We woke up in the morning to sunlight streaming in the kitchen windows and look out down the bluff through the birch and elm trees to see the Mississippi river and valley miles below.

I’d post pictures, but you know my camera…
(I’ll share the rest of the story and our return to Arizona tomorrow)

Would You Like Some Gravy For Your Jello?

2007-05-08T22:00:00.000-07:00

Paul and I, with the help of Paul's half-brother Mike (through his dad), spent the week with the monumental task of cleaning out Grace’s home. We did manage to fill and entire large-sized dumpster with her old belongings (items too old or unusable to donate), but we still have a long way to go. It may take us years.

One of the tasks involved going through her mountains of cookbooks. She loved to cooked and had collected volumes upon volumes of books over the past 60 years. I was tempted to just chuck them all into the dumpster since a quick search on Google will get you any recipe ever created, but I did want to look through the older ones to see if there was anything unique. Am I ever glad I did because was I ever in for the best laugh I’ve had in months!

Paul found a large envelope that was postmarked from 1957 filled with several books sent from the Knox Gelatin company. The books were full of long-lost ways to gel-a-fy just about any meal you could create. I always think of Jello as being a desert, or maybe a fruity side-salad – a Midwest picnic favorite, but apparently women in the 1950’s were experimenting with all kinds of main-dish gelled entrées!

My favorite book of all was "Knox Gelatin in Infant and Child Feeding" It includes some lovely gems like "Chicken Cream Salad" (think Jello here…), "Applesauce and Cheese salad", “Salmon Mouse” (with chocolate?) and "Prune Whip" (yummie!) But just for you, I’m going to share the ingredients my personal favorite! Keep in mind, this is out of a book on recipes for *children*:

Liver and Bacon Loaf

1 envelope Knox Sparkling Gelatine

¼ cup cold water

1 1/4 cups mixed vegetable juice

1 beef bouillon cube

1 tbs lemon juice

1 tbs onion juice

½ teasp salt

1 ½ cups ground boiled liver

4 slices crisp bacon

The instructions go on to describe how to turn it into a nice molded liver Jello.

MMMMMMmmmmm....! “Sparkling Gelatine” and “boiled liver” should never be allowed in the same room together, let alone the same dish.

I am sooooo saving this so I can show it to the kids when they're older. Brigid complained this week that her pizza had "green stuff" on it, and choked and gaged like we gave it to her just to torture her. How did we all live through our childhoods?

Back In Action

2007-05-06T22:00:00.000-07:00

What? No picture with this entry? Why would that be? Well, my most favoritest ever digital camera went hiking in the woods of Wisconsin never to return. The last picture I took was a memorial marker at a rest-area somewhere near Madison, WI. When we got to our destination, I look in my purse and it was gone. I'm much more upset at all the great pictures I lost of our little vacation than the camera itself, but I did love my camera.

Coincidentally I found a Best Buy store-credit card while cleaning out Grace's home, so I may have to go shopping this week. Heaven forbid I just use one of the two or three cameras I already own...

I am so full of stories I'm ready to burst, but I just wanted to post a quick message to let you know we're all back safe and sound. You know all those tornados that hit the middle of the country yesterday? Well, to fly from Minnesota to Arizona, one must fly over the middle of the country. Barf bag anyone? I have flown hundreds, if not thousands, of times in my life. THAT WAS THE WORST EVER!!! I actually saw a bolt of lightning flash right outside of my window, narrowly missing the wing! The plane rocked so much over the 3 hour flight, it may as well have been going upside down.

Of course Mike, Paul's brother the former Delta pilot, was kind enough to tell me that would be impossible because commercial airline jets are not designed to fly upside down. The fuel would slosh away from the engine and the plane's engines would cut out and you'd plummet to your death. Thanks Mike!

We're home. Happy. Home. I'll catch you all up this week on our trip and the decisions that we've made. Life is never boring.

Tina - Unplugged

2007-04-26T22:00:00.001-07:00

Ok, I didn't really etch that... I stole it off the web. I thought it was funny...

This is most likely the last message here for a week, since we're off to yet another homecomming, back to Minnesota to do some final cleanup of the "estate". A very long, difficult and depressing week. But it will be so great to see everyone again

As Stacey pointed out though (my brother's wife), this year has been the most my family has had a chance to see the kids since they were born, so it's kind of a blessing in that regard. Time does tick by too quickly, and this time spent with family is time that would've otherwise just been hurried-away in our busy lives and passed on forever.

The only times people get together is for weddings and funerals I guess. Yay.

I highly doubt I'll have any access to a computer, which isn't a big deal in my personal life, but a very big deal for work. There are so many projects I'm involved in right now that I just have to let go of because I had to pass on the responsibility to someone else. Projects will be there when I get back, but I hate to lose any opportunities. I won't even be able to call in to meetings, and my cell phone only gets sporatic reception. I'm truly unplugged from the office!

Mixed blessing indeed!

Ode To Urgent Care

2007-04-26T22:00:00.000-07:00

Oh Urgent Care Clinic, how I love thee. Let me count the ways. 1) The way you were open on that Sat afternoon at 4:40pm when Brigid suddenly developed a 103 fever while we were at the park. 2) The way you instantly diagnosed my strep throat with your in-house lab. 3) The way you were built just a few blocks from my home. I love thee so.

I love thee so much, I can’t get enough of thee!! Even Paul got to visit your urgent wonderfulness last night. His high fever and achy body were dragged over to you, just as the rest of the family has gotten to do over the last few weeks. And now I get to visit your precious waiting room once again this evening. Aidan is 103-104 and just waiting to take his turn in your open arms.

I had no idea when you showed up over there by the Safeway grocery store that we would get to know one another so very very well. But… I must tell you… we really need to be seeing less of one another. My cube-world is a jealous building, and has noticed I have been missing lately. And you have to remember, it is cube-world that allows us to see one another as often as we do.
Lets not forget to give an honorable mention to CVS pharmacy for supplying the several gallons of anti-biodics that flow through this household. And for other things… you who know me know what I’m talking about…
*grin*

Stuck On You

2007-04-23T22:00:00.000-07:00

What do you think is the stickiest substance on earth? A quick Google search will give you a variety of answers, from marshmallow fluff and dried ketchup to a “super super-glue” produced by a strange bacteria.

I’m here to tell you they’re all wrong! It’s my 4 year old.

Brigid has always been a momma’s girl, but that girl has been stuck to me this past week with the force of SUPER “super super-glue!” All day Sunday she wouldn’t allow me to be away from her for more than 30 seconds. And when I say away from her, I mean without her plastered up against my side as if she has become one with the Tina.

It’s possible she was just tired, and I don’t have to worry about all the other insecurities that could be playing in her head. Four year olds can get mighty strange when they’re tired. I didn’t want to peel her off me and traumatize her if there’s something deeper going on – but I need my personal space girl!

I took the kids to church Sunday morning, and Paul went to the office. I dropped Aidan off in the nursery first, where they have a train table. “Here comes train boy! What’s his name again?” Until he gets over his train obsession, regular Sunday school classes will have to wait. Brigid and I then walked over to her classroom, and I felt her grip my leg and bury her face in my skirt. Although she has a tendency to be shy, this was unusual behavior for even her. I told her if she wanted to, she could come into the service with me, but she’d have to sit quietly. Her classroom teacher already had the crayons and scissors out, but that wasn’t enough to convince my little crafty one to stay. Her face lit up and she promised to sit still and she came into the sanctuary with me. When we sat down, she crawled onto my lap and held her “dee-dah” and sucked her thumb for the entire hour. (see example in photo)

It just got worse from there. The rest of the day she refused to even go to the bathroom alone! Occasionally she would let Aidan attend the big event with her, but otherwise she wanted me around to watch her do her duty. Worse yet, I couldn’t even attend to my own duties without her wanting to sit at my feet. I am not one that appreciates an audience during times of need. She became hysterical when I rocked Aidan in the rocking chair, because she insisted I rock her as well. She wouldn’t even let Paul give her a bath, but cried “I want mommee to do it!!”
I’m glad I’m loved so much, but it was getting ridiculous!

Dropping her off at preschool this morning was truly ripping the band-aid off. She begged to go to work with me. I insisted it’s really not fun where I work, but I knew that wasn’t the point. She just wants to be near me. She looked at me with those big brown eyes and said softly “I love you. I’ll miss you. I’ll see you tomorrow…” (tomorrow is her word for later). She then got a big smile on her face and said “and now I’m going to push you out the door!” She rushed at me and shoved me out the door, laughing the whole time!

I do not pretend to understand.

Make It Yourself!

2007-04-19T22:00:00.000-07:00

I went to lunch with some of my former coworkers today. So? You may ask. What’s the big deal about going out to lunch? The thing is – I almost never go to lunch anymore! I just sit like a big geeky spreadsheet loving lump in my chair all day, and eat at my desk. Some days I might spend 15 minutes walking over to Sprouts, the local natural-foods grocery store to pick up my 2 pears, acai juice and veggie sandwich, but I still just come back to my desk and eat it. I can be very predictable when it comes to food.

But today my former coworkers – let’s be nice and call them friends – came by to drag me off to our favorite Gyro shop. The gyros are ok, but you *have* to see the Greek guy behind the counter! I’m swooning just thinking of him! The way he returns my change, holding my hand in his, and says “Tina, your order will be right up…”

Married woman… married woman…

So at lunch, my girlfriend E (names have been abbreviated to protect the innocent) was chatting about how her husband was out of town, so she was happy she didn’t have to make dinner tonight. E is a good wife. She works hard all day and whisks quickly away from the office in the evening to get home before her husband, so his dinner is always piping hot on the table. I wish I had a wife like that.

I told E that I was crabby last night and told Paul when he came home that he could find leftovers in the fridge if he wanted to eat, and to not bother me about it! I’m tired of food going to waste, and I’m tired of working all day and then working all evening!

E smiled and gave me some helpful advice. She said when she’s feeling that way, and really doesn’t want to make dinner, she gives her husband a call and asks him to bring home some carry out. That’s a good idea.

That’s when I had to admit, Paul actually did call me before he came home and asked me if I wanted him to bring something home. I gripped the phone and shouted “why would you need to bring something home?! Do you think I can’t make dinner without your help?! There’s plenty of food around here so just come home!!”

Dang - I’m a psycho.

Obviously I need to go out to lunch more often or take a break. It’s been a hard year. Either someone is dying in my house, or I’m a walking communicable disease. Calgon anyone? Take me away.

The Baby

2007-04-18T22:00:00.000-07:00

Both the kids along with me are now all sick at the same time. I’m finishing off my bottle of penicillin (the real stuff. I didn’t know they gave that out anymore) for my strep, and the kids seem to be streppy and sinus infectiony. I can’t say for sure because the doctor didn’t officially jab the huge Q-tip down their throats like she did me. She just took one look at them and ordered them their Zithromax. I’m happy for them, I really am.

It’s been awhile since I posted a cutesy kid story, and that’s what you’re really coming here to read, right? Taxes and accounting stories will really only take a blog so far after all, although my life really is fascinating on its own. Really. So if you’re not interested in reading a mother drone on about her precious ones, stop now. You’ve been warned.

I’m feeling nostalgic lately because soon my widdle baby boy will be turning three. I can’t wrap my arms around the concept that I don’t have a baby anymore! An NO that does NOT mean I am dying to have more. But everyone always tells you how fast it all goes, and it’s so true.

And trust me, not too nostalgic about the terrible-twos leaving us forever. Everyday he screams for chocolate milk, and wants it delivered to him in a nano-second before falling into a sobbing heap on the floor. I go to the fridge and pour the milk into a cup and mix up the chocolate, but it’s not in his Thomas cup. Repeat sobbing heap on floor. I move milk into Thomas cup, but he no longer wants chocolate milk; he wants apple juice. Repeat sobbing heap on floor.

It must be the same way I feel about wanting babies and NOT wanting babies.

I just hope my sweet little Aidan gets growing soon. The poor guy has been about 10% on both the height and weight scales his entire life. His doctor has never been worried since he’s always been consistently small – and consistency is the key! At nearly 3 years old, he is just barely fitting into his 2T clothing now, and many of those are too big for him. I put his height, weight, and age into a height predictor on parentcenter.com and it said he has a 96% chance of being within an inch of 5’5” as an adult.

At least he’s smart. He knows every single Thomas the Tank Engine character they’ve ever invented. Even the weird obscure ones like “Cranky the Crane” and “Trevor the Tractor.” He can tell you what color they all are, what shape they are and what number is printed on the side of them. He even invents his own names for things. Like during Christmas, he called any decorative string of lights on a tree a “light choo-choo.”

It almost appears there may be some obsessive genes running through him. Wow. They must *really* be a recessive throwback…

Aidan typically is my sweet little goofball, and he’s always on the lookout for the next big joke . It took Brigid until she was at least 3 or 4 before she found the humor in body functions, but Aidan burst into laughter when I burped in front of him when he was five *months* old! I looked at him and said “you don’t even know what’s funny yet! You think that’s funny?!” I knew I was in big trouble.

The good news is we’ll never have to pay for train riding lessons. He’ll have to figure that one out on his own.

Uncle Sam Wants You

2007-04-15T22:00:00.000-07:00

That's right people!! It's T-DAY!! Due to a local holiday in Washinton D.C. (why didn't they share the holiday?), taxes aren't actually due until Tuesday, April 17.
As a CPA who does *not* do tax work anymore, this time of year makes me smile. I get to watch all my collegues in the field work 70 hour weeks as their hair turn gray and falls out - ha ha! I did it for 2 years, so I've been there too. Knowing how to prepare taxes is a great skill to have in a pinch, but thank God I don't have to do it for hundreds of clients.
That being said, if anyone who reads this little blog has any last minute tax questions, feel free to email me and I'll respond pronto. But I hope by now you've all filed and are seeing your refund check in the mail.
Or you could be like me, and have just turned in your EX-TEN-SION! That's right! The tax expert herself has too complex of a situation this year to have gotten it all done. With Paul a partner in one law firm and sole owner of another, we're still working on getting his corp returns finalized. Extensions are your friend, for both your hair AND taxes! Who knew.

And When You're done With My Pedicure...

2007-04-14T22:00:00.000-07:00

you can go do the dishes! Right Ann?

Since I have absolutely no time anymore to pamper myself, I've been training Brigid in the fine arts of beauty. Why should she be wasting her time combing and primping her My Little Ponies and Barbies when she can be fixing up the old lady?

I didn't post the picture of me sitting here with my eyes coated with blue eye shadow, my lips sparkling with pink-princess glitter, and my hair cliped up with 15 flower clips. I must say, I look better than my picture from a few days ago, but I don't think I'll be going out in public (or even to the mailbox...)

Paul and I hired our favorite babysitter for the evening, Yulia, to come over while we go out on a *gasp* date this evening. Yulia always has the added benefit of leaving my house cleaner than when she came... she's aMAZEing. I wish she would stay 15 forever, or at least until Aidan catches up to her in age so he can marry her.

The Check In The Mail

2007-04-10T22:17:00.000-07:00

Yesterday we received the first check from the auction house that is selling off Grace’s estate. It’s so unsettling to see all of the possessions she had amassed during her lifetime boiled down to a single, quantifiable amount. The emotional baggage behind her hoard-iness we’ll never be able to quantify. But “stuff” has a value.

In an earlier post, I mentioned my apprehension about selling all of Grace’s possessions. I really cannot reconcile the conflicting emotions I feel around her “stuff” – everything from anger, to sadness to just plain relief that we’re getting rid of everything.

Paul and I have lived together for over 10 years, and in the beginning we had nothing. Less than nothing. The furnishings in our first house were completely made up of our old college throw-away and hand-me-down furniture. Many items were things we had literally dumpster-dived for. My friends actually marveled over our 1970’s retro look (think shag carpet, string art lamps, and an olive green kitchen), but we weren’t doing it for its decorative appeal! We were poor.

Poor is OK when you’re just starting out, and I far from expect parents to support kids who have moved out. I knew we were just starting out, and I was quite happy with our lives. But she lived *so near* in her 2700 sq ft 5 bedroom fully-furnished home, by herself. Did she may offer us a dresser? A chair? A desk? No. Nothing. Ever. But she would visit our home and sneer at my lack of style.

Many of the items that she had in her home were inherited by her when Paul’s dad died, and she wouldn’t even share in those things, although I’m sure his dad would’ve wanted him to have them. Even when we were remodeling our 1930’s old farmhouse, not a single hammer would she give us, although she had a whole garage-full and at least 3 of everything. One time Paul borrowed a ladder from her, and she called us several times a day wondering when it would be back, afraid we’d steal it. Every time she couldn’t find something in her garage, she would be on the phone with Paul, accusing him of taking it. It got to the point where Paul spray-painted all the tools that we purchased orange, so he’d know for certain they weren’t hers. To this day we still have orange tools.

There was another time Paul asked her if we could borrow her barbeque grill so we could have some friends over and grill out. She told him he could have her old one, as long as we took care of it. When Paul went to pick it up, she wasn’t home and he didn’t know which one was the old one, and which one was the new one. He accidentally took the new one, which was probably purchased for $99 at Home Depot. After the party when I went out to put the grill in the shed for the night, it was gone! I panicked, thinking that we were in big trouble because it was stolen! It turns out, she had driven by and seen we had taken her “good” grill, so she angrily took it back and never allowed us to borrow one again. For Christmas, she bought us our very own – no strings attached. Ha ha!

These are only but a few stories. I have hundreds. Notice I said “she bought us” a new grill and she didn’t give us her old one. Even if she had 12 of an item (which she did many times) she would prefer to buy us another one, usually from a rummage sale, rather than give up one of hers. She was very very weird about her stuff.

So fast forward to today, and receiving an itemized listing from the auction of all her stuff. Gone off to the world in an instant. Another wave of sadness washes over me to think of how she wasted so much energy protecting all of her stuff – for what? She wouldn’t let us touch it when she was alive. Did she think we would protect it all when she was gone?

This is what it comes down to people! Look around your home and all your STUFF. Share it now and bless others with your abundance, because you know what? When you die, it will all be gone in an instant and your descendants will just get a check.

A very small check.

A 4 Year Old's Idea Of Sharing

2007-04-10T22:13:00.000-07:00

"Mommy?"
"Yes?"
"Do grownups eat candy?"
"Sometimes... why?"
"Because I love you and want to share my candy to you"
"Oh! That's so sweet! Thank you!"

*basking in love of the child*

"Mommy?"
"Yes?"
"I love you so much I will ALWAYS share my candy that I don't like to you"

ARG! And the worst part was, I didn't even see that coming!

In Case You Didn't Notice, Today Is Easter!

2007-04-08T22:11:00.000-07:00

Peeps, cupcakes, dyed eggs, chocolate, toys... and we let the kids have some fun too. Now I know why we had kids! If there's ever any doubt that I have a deep, deep inner child, there is none now.

We woke up early this morning to the sound of Aidan's howlings. Why at nearly 3 years old he has to wake up wailing still, I can't figure out. Don't normal kids just get up and go watch TV or play, or at least gently nudge their parents awake? Aidan has to sit at our bedroom door and bawl (with real tears streaming down) until someone picks him up and rocks him in the rocking chair. He prefers it if we also sing the theme song to Thomas the Tank Engine, but I won't admit to spoiling him that much... anyway...

With me barely awake, I noticed Paul... I mean the Easter Bunny... had stealthfully snuck outside without the children noticing. Brigid remembered from last year the fun of the egg hunt, and was soon out the door to hunt eggs. While they were outside, it gave me a chance to grab the Target bags from the closet and fill up the Easter baskets with treats. While I distracted the children, the EB grabbed the baskets and hid them as well. Brigid really though the bunny was sneaking around hiding things on her! Once the kids found the baskets, I can tell you, the house was mighty quiet for the next few hours as they tore open their candy and treats!

I didn't get many pictures this year, since I was busy just watching and enjoying the morning. A picture can't capture the giggle and squeels of delight anyway.

I'm tired tonight and my writing isn't as coherent, so off to bed I go. A tired accountant is a crabby accountant, and nobody wants one of them around.

Homeward Bound

2007-04-05T22:00:00.000-07:00

(picture from June 2005 visit to Grace's house - backyard picture - beautiful)
In all the excitement about buying tickets to Germany (beer! food!), I completely forgot to mention that we also have a trip planned to Wisconsin at the end of this month! Although Wisconsin may not have quite the exciting impact that Germany has, we're still pretty excited.
We plan to do the final clean out of Grace's house to put it on the market. I can't even try to put into words the emotions behind what we're doing. 10 years ago I met Paul in this very house, when I showed up at his door for a job interview (I got the job...) It's a beautiful home, there's no doubt. But what are we to do with a 2700 sq foot home on a 2 acre lot in La Crescent, MN? We live in Arizona. It's just too much for us to keep.

No doubt Grace is rolling in her grave over this... not to mention the sale of the majority of her possessions.

It's just the horrible reality of life. You can't take it with you. Personally, I'm not that attached to my "things", but she was. I know that things do not equal memories. Things are just things while you're here on earth. And really, I'd prefer to share in my abundance and bless others with my extras than hoard what I have and live in fear of running out.

But Paul and I have been together now for over 10 years, and we already have a whole household full of "stuff". Although many of her items are better than ours, we just don't need more. I truely believe you can get tied down by your stuff, and by just setting it free, you're setting yourself free. But still, it's painful to set all of her stuff free. It just finalizes the death all the more.

Anyway, about going to Wisconsin - we are very excited to see everyone again. And this time the visit should be more relaxed, since we're not trying to plan an entire funeral this time! Although we'll be busy with house things, there should be plenty of time for visits.

And it's spring!! It's already 90 degrees, hot and dry here in Arizona and feels like summer has hit. I can't wait to spend a week in the cool, wet spring of the upper Mississippi river valley! The green is so beautifully "spring green" - that light shade of new green grass and leaves that you only see in April and May. The trees will just be budding and the flowers poking out of the soil. I love just breathing in the clean spring air, uninhibited by the big city smog and blowing dust. I don't care if it's 40 degrees everyday - we're going to love it!

I do love living here in Arizona, and I can post another day about the wonders of the desert and "dry heat", but right now I've got my sights set on home! :)

How To Boil The Perfect Egg!

2007-04-02T22:00:00.000-07:00

I do not have too much cooking pride to admit that I needed to look up how to boil eggs. But while I was doing so, I ran into this PERFECT boiled egg recipe from http://www.recipesource.com/ and I thought I should share with all my friends. Happy Easter!

* Exported from MasterCook The Perfect Hard Boiled EggRecipe By : Julia Child, “The Way to Cook”Serving Size : 1 Preparation Time :0:40Categories : Cheese/Eggs Family RecipesAmount Measure Ingredient --

Preparation Method-------- ------------ --------------------------------

For 1-4 Eggs:1 to 4 Eggs2 quarts water -- * see noteFor 12 Eggs:12 Eggs3 1/2 quarts water

-- * see noteFor 24 Eggs:24 Eggs6 quarts water -- * see noteSpecial Equipment_________________________

High (not wide) Saucepan with coverBowl w/ice cubes & water (large enough tocompletely cover eggs)*note: water should cover the eggs by 1 inch, so use a tall pan, and limitcooking to 2 dozen eggs at a time.1. Lay the eggs in the pan and add the amount of cold water specified. Setover high heat and bring just to the boil; remove from heat, cover the pan,and let sit exactly 17 minutes.2. When the time is up, transfer the eggs to the bowl of ice cubes andwater. Chill for 2 minutes while bringing the cooking water to the boilagain. (This 2 minute chilling shrinks the body of the egg from the shell.)3. Transfer the eggs (6 at a time only) to the boiling water, bring to theboil again, and let boil for 10 seconds - this expands the shell from theegg. Remove eggs, and place back into the ice water.Chilling the eggs promptly after each step prevents that dark line fromforming, and if time allows, leave the eggs in the ice water after the laststep for 15 to 20 minutes. Chilled eggs are easier to peel, as well.The peeled eggs will keep perfectly in the refrigerator, submerged in waterin an uncovered container, for 2 to 3 days.-

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - NOTES : The perfect hard boiled egg has a tender white, and a yolk properlyset. There is not the faintest darkening of yolk where the white encirclesit (a chemical reaction caused by too much heat in the cooking process).Eggs cooked this way can also be peeled neatly.The system described here, developed by the Georgia Egg Board, takes a bitof fussing - but it really does produce an absolutely Perfect Hard Boiled Egg!

Spreck In Ze Doych?

2007-03-29T22:00:00.000-07:00

Obviously I don’t speak German, but I better learn fast! Paul bought us all tickets to Germany for August! I’ve never been to Europe (strange… I know… after everywhere I have been) and I can’t even count to ten in German. Paul bought the kids some little German games and tapes to help them learn some words, so I will have to sit in on those sessions myself! I’m hoping that since I’ve learned both Spanish and Chinese, my ability to pick up a language is pretty built up.
I love beer, and I love food, so I’m pretty sure I’m gonna like this country!

When I first met Paul, he and his mom had just returned from a trip to see his relatives in Germany, and that was the last time he had gone! We have talked about going there for years, but have always put it off for one reason or another – especially the two little reasons that came along 5 years ago!

One of the reasons we’re excited about traveling to Germany now and to bring the kids is the week Brigid was born, two other little girl cousins were also born in Germany! The family isn’t that large, so there really was a lot of fuss over that. We’ve shared pictures over the internet for the past 4 years and have all watched the girls grow up together. Grace was always the first to point out features where they looked alike or compare details like who was talking the most, walking the most, etc.

And yes, Grace’s passing is the big push that made us decide to make the trip. I’m sure it will be hard on Paul to be reminded of her, and I’m sure he will miss her, but it will be good for him to be around family that loved her and will want to reminisce and speak fondly of her.
I’m a bit nervous thinking about flying that long with the little ones, but they are old enough now to handle it. Before now, it seemed silly to spend the huge bucks to travel internationally with them if they wouldn’t even remember the trip, but now they should get a lot more out of it.
I dug out and dusted off my passport last night. I need to take it to the passport office today to get an updated one. Mine expired in 2004! I’m concerned because I’ve seen in the news lately that there is a huge backlog at the passport office and passports have been getting delayed for months. We have over 4 months before we’re leaving, so that better be enough time! The fact that I have Japan as my birthplace tends to get mine more scrutiny, even though I’m a US citizen.

Spring Green AND Red!

2007-03-22T22:00:00.000-07:00

There's a picture of my little sprout! Oh... and Brigid too!

Brigid had a new project in school this week that she came home with. She surprised me with a little cup of dirt! Most people probably don't get too excited about dirt, but I grew up with my hands in the soil. We've faithfully been watering her little cup all week, and we now have 4 little tomato sprouts peeking out of the soil at us.

When we were growing up, mom always had a big vegetable garden out in the back yard, since it's almost impossible not to grow vegetables during summer in the midwest. My favorite time of year has always been the fall, simply because I love a whole season of fresh vegetables. My very favorite vegetable of all to grow has always been tomatoes. They're relatively easy to grow, and they offer the most satisfaction of any vegetable as they get huge and ripe and red. I loved sitting in the kitchen on cold fall evenings while mom had her pressure cooker whistling and steaming and canning jars scattered around the counter top. We'd have to smash up the cooked tomatoes and push them through the strainer so they could be canned and we'd enjoy our efforts all winter long as spaghetti, chili, and various noodle dishes.

Before we started growing children, Paul and I also grew vegetables. We had a little tiny yard in our house in Minnesota, and at least 1/4 of it was our vegetable garden. Tomatoes, potatoes, radishes, carrots, pumpkins, strawberries, grapes, watermellons, cucumbers... and more! Of course we only used 100% organic products to keep the pests away The only time I didn't enjoy weeding my plot was when I was 7, 8 and 9 months pregnant with Brigid. Other than that, I always enjoyed hanging out in the yard, digging in the soil and scooping up the worms. I never have canned tomatoes myself, but I would often cook them down and freeze them for the winter (MUCH easier!)

Fast forward a few years to living in Arizona. My garden days have been seriously limited. The growing season is right now, but gardening in the desert sand is a far cry from the black soils of Minnesota. I've tried "container gardening", which produced me exactly 5 tomatoes off of 3 plants and 3 months of work. We've cut down a tree and filled the hole with soil purchsed from Home Depot, and watched our plants wither and die. I've tried several parts of the yard, and have yet found a decent spot that will grow a tomato.

Yet, try try again we will! We already have our tomato cages ready to hold plants that will grow big and full of ripe tomatoes this time! I've found a new spot in the yard and when her sprouts are ready to transplant, we're going to give it our best shot again. I have purchased a new book called "Extreme Gardening" which was written by a Phoenix gardener, and it gives some new tips I didn't know about on how to trick your desert yard into thinking it can grow vegetables.
So, check back here later this spring for my tomato plant updates!